12.25.20

Gemini version available ♊︎

The EPO Carol

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 9:49 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

On the first day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
Messages about increase in fee

On the second day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the third day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

I didn't know stealing EPO money was illegal, I swear!On the fourth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the fifth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the sixth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the seventh day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
a threatening melody from Élodie
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the eighth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
my belongings from my desk
a threatening melody from Élodie
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the ninth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
an order to remain home
my belongings from my desk
a threatening melody from Élodie
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

For EPO Management: those stealing all office capital; those doing all the actual workOn the tenth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
a deadline to complete a spied-on survey
an order to remain home
my belongings from my desk
a threatening melody from Élodie
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the eleventh day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
an invitation to a patent troll’s ViCo
a deadline to complete a spied-on survey
an order to remain home
my belongings from my desk
a threatening melody from Élodie
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

On the twelfth day of Christmas
the Office sent to me:
instructions to go away after less than 5 years
an invitation to a patent troll’s ViCo
a deadline to complete a spied-on survey
an order to remain home
my belongings from my desk
a threatening melody from Élodie
a signed photograph of king Campinos
requirement of installing spyware on my PC
increase in production targets
proposal of pension cuts
notification of pay decrease
and messages about increase in fee

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