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07.30.19

Microsoft Loves About 7% of GNU/Linux

Posted in GNU/Linux, Humour, Microsoft at 7:26 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Microsoft loves Microsoft

Summary: A very old cartoon/column (half a century old) rewritten to explain where Microsoft stands when it comes to “loving” Linux

06.05.19

Drunk on Power

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 12:04 pm by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

EPO President António Campinos depicted by an anonymous observer earlier this evening

EPO drunk
“He always said he had everything under control, really? Rumors say the opposite…”

Summary: A recent incident believed or alleged to have involved Campinos gets people talking

THE above cartoon was soon followed by [1, 2, 3, 4, 5]:

Ten Signs Your CEO is a Failure

1. Your CEO has little to no interaction with regular employees, spending most of his or her time with a few senior executives.
More
2. You have heard your CEO’s name but don’t know anything else about him or her.
3. Your CEO doesn’t seem to know about or care about the company culture — his or her interest is strictly in the numbers.
4. Your CEO hires and promotes people who are not qualified for their jobs, and doesn’t seem to value leadership abilities in his or her senior staff.
5. Your CEO spends more time in front of the media than dealing with his or her own teammates.
6. Your CEO manages through intimidation, threatening to fire people when they goof up.
7. Your CEO blames other people for mistakes rather than taking responsibility for them.
8. Your CEO doesn’t seek input, but makes decisions in private and announces them as done deals.
9. Your CEO takes credit for successes, rather than sharing the limelight.
10. Your CEO doesn’t seem to care about anyone except him- or herself.

04.12.19

Caricature: EPO Standing Tall

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 10:35 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Earlier: New Building as Perfect Metaphor for the EPO Under the Frenchmen Battistelli and Campinos

EPO Pisa

Summary: A reader’s response to the EPO’s tall claims and fluff from yesterday

03.31.19

Microsoft Loves Linux

Posted in GNU/Linux, Humour, Microsoft at 8:29 pm by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

It tastes good.

I'm not eating

Summary: GNU/Linux, the main competitor of Microsoft, is what Microsoft loves the most

OK, so it’s April 1st already. People are starting to play along with it (“Microsoft is Creating Linux-based Smartphone OS” has just been published). In recent years we made some jokes about the EPO and USPTO (on April 1st), but quite frankly April 1st on the World Wide Web has become somewhat of a passing fad. More than a decade ago it was a real sensation, but nowadays it’s a source of annoyance and confusion; it can be a nuisance trying to figure out what’s true and what’s satire; the latter concept has been conflated with so-called ‘fake news’.

So anyway, Microsoft loves Linux, as we shall show in our next post, based on a true story.

07.04.18

Cartoon on Brexistelli: “The End of a Dictatorship”

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 9:53 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

The End of a Dictatorship

Summary: “The End of a Dictatorship,” a new cartoon from EPO insiders

04.21.18

Short: This Spring’s Message From the EPO’s President (Corrected)

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 10:35 pm by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Word from EPO's President

Summary: A corrected preface from the Liar in Chief, the EPO‘s notoriously crooked and dishonest President

04.01.18

António Campinos Withdraws From Plan to Directly Run the EPO, Patent Office to be Run by Google ‘AI’ Instead

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 8:17 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Early Certainty From Google

Campinos in the penthouse

Summary: Campinos can hereon manage remotely, enjoying a drink while Google Patents™ with a proprietary computer program does all the management

THE EPO patent-granting machine, recognising cost-cutting potential and prospect of replacing people with machines, has followed the footsteps of Battistelli’s extraordinarily fantastic and very high-quality leadership. In defiance of USPTO efforts to let pesky individuals get in the way and in the interests of improving efficiency, the EPO decided to hire programmers in order to replace all management — President and Vice-Presidents included — with computer programs. Conflicts and liability for them would thus be solely bits and bytes, further emboldened by diplomatic immunity such bits and bytes can enjoy and relieve. ILO is poorly equipped to handle complaints against algorithms, “which is a feature,” Campinos remarked, “not a bug.” Mr. Gurry congratulated Campinos on the move on behalf of WIPO, further remarking that “you can even draw blood and DNA from your staff and nobody will ever do anything to you, as Uber demonstrated a month ago.”

12.01.17

EPO Caricature: Son of Campinos

Posted in Europe, Humour, Patents at 4:12 am by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Context: Immunity of the Intellectual Property Office of the European Union Causes Outrage in Spanish Media

Son of Campinos

Summary: The latest in the cartoon series about the EPO turns to Mr. Campinos, who is due to become President in exactly 7 months

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