Bonum Certa Men Certa

The 'Modern' Web

Reprinted with permission from Ryan Farmer

I Just Call It “Diarrhea Code” When I Encounter a Website That Won’t Work in SeaMonkey.



When you’re not nice to idiots who make “Modern” stuff, like “Diarrhea Code”, they pretty much just ban you from everything.



It’s “bad” to be opposed to bloated Web sites that stick out a sign saying you’re not welcome here because they’ve made a mess and it only works in Firefox and Chromium.



The reason I call code meant for Chromium “Diarrhea Code” is because it reminds me of what happens to a toilet bowl after you had too much Taco Bell and Mountain Dew. Stuff goes flying everywhere, it’s nasty, it makes the paint peel off the walls. It makes the buttons melt off your shirt. And you can’t wait to get rid of it.



20 years ago people began to push for what the Web is now. Binary blobs that run untrustworthy applications in your browser, too much JavaScript, HTML files that are several MB long and impossible to read that call out to this.



And they criticized people like me for writing clean, readable, markup, which was parsed, displayed, and presented to the user, over dial up modems, in a matter of seconds.



In 1999, you could right-click on my site and read the entire source code of the page. You didn’t have to take my word as to what was in there. I couldn’t have hidden much in there if I wanted to. HTML 3 and 4 were clean and readable by humans.



People said the situation where browsers would “forgive” slightly bogus tag use or the occasional typo (which I checked for) was “unacceptable” and now you have Microsoft Azure pumping in stuff that’s barely even code when you try to pay your electric bill with ComEd, and Chrome, Firefox, and Edge happily try to make sense of tens of megabytes of that.



Today in the GNOME room I was somewhat horrified to learn that you can make a Firefox .desktop that can handle mailto: with a Webmail “provider”.



I responded,



Webmail *barf*



They all have different interfaces. Piles of JavaScript, their spam filtering is not uniformly effective, and they almost always have ads and tracking scripts, or at least whitespace where the ads are supposed to go. Consider SeaMonkey Mail.



Now if you do load Outlook in Firefox, it tries to register itself to handle mailto: *rolls eyes* with a banner that pops up. Also, I have to lie to Google about my SeaMonkey UA with a pref to make it think I’m Thunderbird, even though the underlying Mail code IS FROM THUNDERBIRD.



Jamie Zawinski’s “Law of Software Envelopment” said that all programs expand until they can read email.



Giving mail so some garbage Web browser, which is made to run “Diarrhea Code” is only about the worst way you could expand something to read email.



Email belongs in a reader that supports POP3 and IMAP. Email should be text-only.



Sylpheed is a good Email program, but I doubt it could even handle GMail because of the entire OAuth debacle and needing to load a Web page to handle that, which sniffs to see if you’re “on the list” of allegedly secure “apps”, like Thunderbird, which just rewrote the entire GUI.



Someone already wrote why WASMs are terrible for security.



They have introduced an entire unique set of CVEs (listed in the monthly Mozilla patch updates, WASMs are roughly 10% of the attack footprint of the entire Firefox browser!) that will never stop, and they’re on by default in Tor Browser.



If you use a Web browser to handle your mail, eventually what they’re probably going to do is just rewrite the entire “Web” thing into a WASM blob which is so much worse than “Diarrhea Code”.



It won’t even be markup and scripts anymore. Just a binary program you can run it like it is, and none of your extensions (NoScript, ublock-origin, etc.) can act on the elements as they come in.



WASM is part of the Google trap to destroy the Open Web.



Widevine (Web DRM…I turn it off) and WASM are the warm up band for WEI.



And why wouldn’t you trust some skeevy porn or bittorrent site to send a WASM your way?



After all, Windows is a *very secure* operating system because you can just trust the operating system company that already has 95% of the total malware to make sure that WASMs can’t do any harm. 😛



And Mozilla can *obviously* make sure they stay in the “sandbox”. *LOL*



Even when they do stay in the browser sandbox, they can still do a lot of damage. They can spy on the user. They can mine crypto.



Crypto Miners that load in Web pages boasted that they were early adopters of WASM and they could use the victim’s phone or laptop to mine “Monero” at “70% of the speed of a native program”.



Turn it off.



Security Posers talking about “threat models” and “Secure Boot” in the firmware are just absolutely laughable in light of all of the new threats the same people, and the companies that handle them, stuff into everything.



This is worse than ActiveX and Internet Explorer. At least all you had to do to stay safe from that was find some other browser.



Now all Mozilla does is blind copy things from Google.

Recent Techrights' Posts

SLAPP Censorship - Part 116 Out of 200: 5 Years of Multiparty Lawfare Against Techrights, Funded by Americans and Also by Third Parties (Including Microsoft Salaries)
The public and our government will be informed in full
After IBM's Shares Collapsed the CEO is Trying the "Quantum" Trick Again, Bolstered by a Demented Dictator in the White House
from what we can gather IBM's CEO is trying to get the US government to participate in the scam
SLAPP Censorship - Part 115 Out of 200: Spending the Next Decade Writing About SLAPPs and Trying to Fix the System
It's the same industry that got paid by corrupt EPO officials to try to cover up the corruption
 
The Media's "Satya Says" Syndrome Distracts From Grim Reality
how insiders see Microsoft slop
Oracle's Collapse Has Nothing to do With Slop, It's About Its Debt Exploding by Almost 50% in Just 12 Months
How are people meant to trust the media?
Now... a Word From Our Sponsor
Powerade
Links 23/06/2026: Microsoft Studio Closures and Journalism Subjected to Further Cuts
Links for the day
Gemini Links 23/06/2026: Gardens, Basketball, Blocking Hyperscaler, and New Commodore Phone
Links for the day
Links 23/06/2026: Apple Price Hikes and Technical Debt in Slop
Links for the day
Greece Ought to Curb the Threat of Social Control Media
its national discourse seems to be run by an American company called Facebook
State of the GNU/Linux Desktop (and Laptop)
The time to advocate GNU/Linux is now
The 'XBox Narrative' Distracts From Destructive Cuts Across the Whole of Microsoft
Microsoft is preparing to lay off a likely record-breaking number of people [...] this isn't just an XBox problem
Microsoft's Stock Fell Nearly $200, But the Real Problems Are Just About to Begin
if they dump slop, what will they tell shareholders?
The Cyber Show on Starmer and Software Freedom
The Cyber Show's Andy has just explained why our departing national leader wasn't all bad
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Monday, June 22, 2026
IRC logs for Monday, June 22, 2026
Gemini Links 23/06/2026: Girlrotting, Homeworlds at BGA, Slop Ruins Sites
Links for the day
A Lifetime of Whistleblowing
Ellsberg did not have an easy life, but it was a rewarding life with a rich legacy focusing on justice
European Patent Office (EPO) Series: A Man With Many Missions...
Campinos – accompanied by Gilles Requena and Patrice Pellegrino
Links 22/06/2026: Ubisoft Co-founder Dies, Americans Have Turned Against Slop
Links for the day
Links 22/06/2026: "The Sycophancy Machine" and "Port 22 Open for 54 Days"
Links for the day
When People Who Make the Most Money Are the Best "Boot Lickers" (Sucking Up to Jeffrey Epstein's Circle and the Dictator)
Sucking up to rich people may pay off
The Aim is Not Fame
Reposted from schestowitz.com
"Internally Important, Externally Irrelevant": IBM in a Nutshell
Right now its debt spins out of control and its stock spirals down the drain
SLAPP Censorship - Part 114 Out of 200: Thousands of Long Articles to Come, Properly Covering the SLAPP Industry in the UK and Its Modus Operandi
"Stowell described SLAPPs as ‘a stain on our legal system’."
Finding a Way to Get Paid to Improve LibreJS
So now we have more people resurrecting LibreJS and improving it
Microsoft Can't Even Wait Until July, Shutdowns and Layoffs Already Happening
Mashable speak of "a grim picture for the state of Xbox."
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Sunday, June 21, 2026
IRC logs for Sunday, June 21, 2026
Gemini Links 22/06/2026: Appreciating Simple Things, Perfect Summer Evening, IRIX, Vim and so
Links for the day
Chad's Move to GNU/Linux or the Point of Exceeding 5% "Market Share"
experienced centuries of being colonised
Gemini Links 21/06/2026: Dating Oaks, Paying With Cash, and "More on Withered Technology"
Links for the day
GAFAM is Drowning in Debt, GAFAM is Clearly Not Sustainable Anymore (It Runs on Borrowed Money and Bailouts)
The war and surrender in Iran will deepen the debt; we'll see the GAFAM reports in late July
GAFAM Was Never an Ally to Europe
Only 1 in 10 Europeans see US as an ally — study [...] military providers in "tech" clothing cannot be trusted
GitHub, LinkedIn, and XBox Will Finish Like Skype (Sustainability Crisis)
Skype should become a verb. When Microsoft 'Skypes' something it means it basically shuts it down with some temporal excuse/s.
Drowning in Garbage: AUR Shows That Too Much Low-Quality Software (Including Slop) is Bad for Everybody
What happened in AUR had happened elsewhere before and will happen again in the future
Links 21/06/2026: EU on Patented (Monopolised) Crops, Microsoft Software "Narcs on You to Your Boss"
Links for the day
Microsoft at 50 Follows the General Trajectory of Skype
How many years does Microsoft have left before payroll becomes impossible?
A Year After a Microsofter Took Over The Register MS It is Effectively a Content Farm With News as a 'Side Dish'
This is not journalism, this is spam
IBM Pays the Media and Cons Some 'Journalists' Into Participating in "Quantum" Spam
"The Boy Who Cried Wolf"
You Don't Need an 'App' for Your Birdhouse (Slopfondlers Come for Birds)
That they sell those things as "AI" really says a lot about how dishonest slopfondlers really are
SLAPP Censorship - Part 113 Out of 200: The United Kingdom is Not Turkey
Turkey is ranked almost worst in the Western World for press freedom
Cybersecurity Does Not Mean Asking Microsoft for Permission to Boot
There were very good and timely reasons to speak about the matter, including impending antitrust complaints against Microsoft
Links 21/06/2026: Bots from Alibaba Do Harm and Many Xbox Games Are Being Cancelled
Links for the day
5 Years After Release of Vista 11 Not Even One in 5 People Use It (in the US)
It doesn't look like Vista 11 will ever be adopted like prior versions and announcing a Vista 12 will mostly upset companies/organisations that only recently "upgraded" to 11
Gemini Links 21/06/2026: Boca Raton, Perfect Summer Day, and LLM Doing Things Poorly
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Saturday, June 20, 2026
IRC logs for Saturday, June 20, 2026