11.05.16
Gemini version available ♊︎EPO President Benoît Hernandez About the Social Atmosphere and Life’s Great Joys
Summary: A show I just caught on TV…
Transcript:
Fake TV interview with the fake President of the EPO, Benoît Hernandez
I’m the President
They call me Blatter, they think that’s clever and they think that I care
Well done, idiots, but let me tell you something
I do whatever the f*** I want
One way or another I’ll get my chinchillas at the Council to do what I tell them
I got myself total immunity
It’s great, isn’t it?
Seriously
I can even punish innocent people
F*** em!
And I do it all the time, even yesterday with that French dude, you should have seen that look on his face when he packed his things
I wrote an internal announcement and said “sniper” again
Some people actually believe all this bullshit and join FFPE afterwards
Some bloody idiots
They actually believe I ride a bicycle
Like I’m some friggin’ peasant
They don’t know I’m trying to get an EPO limo
You can’t make this s*** up
I can say anything I want
I lie several times a day and the media repeats the lies
Bloody bloody stupid media, they don’t even fact-check before publishing their s***
I got them by the balls
Some of them became media partners of the EPO
See, that’s the media, that’s how it operates
Throw some money at FTI Consulting and it’s done
My nose doesn’t even grow any longer
Imagine if they checked the facts
I’d look like a crook
Even Jesper would poke fun at me
He knows me, even my salary and my contractual increases
It’s massive!
Elodie signed it all off!
Even VP4′s
We told the chinchillas he’s awesome
And law-abiding despite all that c*** in Croatia
You should have seen what he did in Croatia to his staff, one person even committed suicide
And that’s actually funny?
Yes, I killed 5 in my Office
It doesn’t get any better than this
I’ve ruined entire families
You start with a disciplinary action
And they never know what’s gonna hit them?
I tell them perception of justice and all that nonsense about appeals and ILO
Little do they know I’ll be back with Sarkozy in my mid-seventies by the time ILO touches the darn thing
I actually find it very amusing
Did I tell you about my Willy?
He told Dutch television their High Court is rubbish
You should have seen Raimund, he wanted to hug him