Bonum Certa Men Certa

Shut Up and Learn to Maintain an Application Suite

Article by YOU Can Call Me "Mr. Developer" Actually, You Can Call Me "SIR Mr. Developer"



Summary: "Try and maintain a complex piece of software like a browser or an office suite, and then you'll understand."

Ah, the good old days... People used to complain, and we would tell them to stop snivelling and learn to code.



Now they pretend that even Free Software can do unethical things. Where do they get these ridiculous ideas?

Free Software can't be unethical. You can always change the code, so PLEASE stop whinging about how it "spies" on you or got your dog pregnant -- we seriously don't care. We are just volunteers.

I know there was this guy -- Shopman? Schtolman? Wait, Torvalds! He used to talk about something like this, but seriously, who codes in a bathrobe?

Google Street View logs WiFi networks, Mac addressesYou never hear Greg talking about that kind of nonsense. I mean, he's too busy coding (and putting on some clothes first.)

But the rest of you, for crying out loud -- just because "stuff happens" on your side and we get "data" about it on our side, doesn't make it "spyware" -- we aren't spies. As I said, we are just volunteers.

You don't understand ethics because you probably don't write any code. I mean you say you do, you even showed us your GitHub repo, but you certainly haven't written any code for us, so we don't expect you to understand.

I don't mean anything by it, you know -- when I laughed at you on Twitter, I didn't say you were "crazy" or "stupid", just LOL. If we can't laugh, that's a serious problem. Then again, so is all this (frankly, very uninformed) whinging.

"But the rest of you, for crying out loud -- just because "stuff happens" on your side and we get "data" about it on our side, doesn't make it "spyware" -- we aren't spies. As I said, we are just volunteers."Sometimes we sell data to Google. It's not YOUR data, it's OUR data. We're the ones who found it. Yes, we wrote code for your browser to send it to us.

You can turn it off, you know. Just go to about:config and click "Yes I'm sure", then agree to the EULA and email us a letter stating that you understand and agree to proper usage of our trademarks, then click "Show All settings" and add the key "browser.surveillance.telemetry.justkidding.spyonusmaybe" and set it to string value "0x3b338912" and we won't send any data in until we think of another way to make you even MORE free.

I don't think you people get why we do this stuff. It's all to help us help YOU. And this is the thanks we get!

When we sell the data, we also put that into helping YOU. But first we print it all out and go at your personal information really firmly with a rubber. Your privacy is totally safe!

Didn't you learn anything when people tried to say that Ubuntu Unity Amazon Lens was spyware? Mark Shuttleworth explained all this, he said that if you trust Canonical with root access then obviously, you're giving them permission to do whatever -- and if you gave them permission, you shouldn't complain. And that's what trust is all about!

So really, we aren't even asking for root access. Just sending some data from your software to our servers which is absolutely and in every way perfectly useless for indicating anything that you're doing in a way that could you know, somehow "track" what you're doing. Just think of it as random numbers, alright? Random numbers that aren't at all important.

"Sometimes we sell data to Google. It's not YOUR data, it's OUR data. We're the ones who found it. Yes, we wrote code for your browser to send it to us."What I'd like to see is any of you whingers and peons try to maintain your own web browser, alright? I mean, it looks easy, but it's really hard work! And then a bunch of uppity know-it-alls -- sorry, I mean you people start talking about "ethics" like we did something wrong! And they you say we are spying on you! We are a non-profit, Hello? EVERYTHING we do is ethical.

Try and maintain a complex piece of software like a browser or an office suite, and then you'll understand.

Until then, PLEASE just shut up already, it's not helping anything. Turn off your computer and go put your tinfoil hats on, but don't bother us with a bunch of silly nonsense. Come back when you want to contribute some code, or help pay for our time, when you've grown up a little.

Thanks!

"Try and maintain a complex piece of software like a browser or an office suite, and then you'll understand."Also, by all means, please feel free to copy and share this with your other loser friends who have nothing better to do than complain all the time.

Yours Sincerely,

Fed Up Developer Tired Of All The Whinging

(Sir Fed Up Developer Tired Of All The Whinging, to you.) ⬆

Public Domain

Recent Techrights' Posts

Intercontinental Brigading - Part XIV - Six Years of Learning Irish, But the Real Issue Was Microsoft-controlled 'Secure' (Restricted) Boot
Had I not opposed back doors in Linux, not of this would come about
Microsoft Sort of Tried to Sell XBox Piecewise (Offloading Microsoft)
XBox is in a morbid state
Linux is Not Controlled by Linus (Torvalds)
Torvalds has become "90% marketing hype"
 
It's Slop
Maybe we'll exclude It's Slop from our curation. It's a Linux Foundation outpost of sorts, an apologist of sloppy code and plagiarism.
Gemini Links 25/10/2026: Moana (2026) and OpenBSD Updates
Links for the day
The Netherlands Fast to Adopt GNU/Linux, "Market Share" Rises to Two-Digit Value (on Desktops/Laptops)
It peaked at around 20% yesterday
DST Still Needs to Get Abolished
Get rid of DST, efficiency will improve and systems will become more reliable
PHP2Shell as Paid-for FUD Campaign (Intended to Help Sell Slop and Fake "Market Value" of Slop Pushers)
PHP2Shell considered overhyped [...] Remember all the paid-for hype regarding Mythos? What happened to all that?
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Saturday, October 24, 2026
IRC logs for Saturday, October 24, 2026
Gemini Links 24/10/2026: Arch Linux Journey and Amin Bandali's Priorities
Links for the day
Bluewashing as a Form of Silent Layoffs
IBM will continue to shed off loads of workers while its debt climbs
Turning 20 in 2 Weeks and Upcoming Network Maintenance
That ought not interrupt our anniversary
Microsoft Shutdowns Accelerating, More Shutdowns Revealed (Not Connected to Gaming)
Silent layoffs disguised as "voluntary" "exits"
Links 24/10/2026: Microsoft Blackmail and Lingering Unrest in France:
Links for the day
Gemini Links 24/10/2026: From Bendigo to Kerang, Enshittification of Radio and Music in the UK
Links for the day
Red Hat Sinks With the Blue (IBM) Ship
As IBM's debt continues to soar so do the silent layoffs
The "No Pain No Gain" Expectations in Publishing
Sometimes truth hurts; but that does not mean it mustn't be told
Intercontinental Brigading - Part XIII - Censorship by All Means Available in a Continent So Far Away, as 'Secure' (Restricted, Restriction by Microsoft) Boot Has a Crisis of Legitimacy
it's about America controlling sites and computers everywhere
Links 24/10/2026: Oligarchs Already Buy US Elections, GAFAM Front Group "EFF" Speaks of "Vulnerability Apocalypse"
Links for the day
Gemini Links 24/10/2026: Automobile Differential Tire Movement, Samsung Washer Woe, and Slop Scraping
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Friday, October 23, 2026
IRC logs for Friday, October 23, 2026
As Usual, Late on a Friday XBox (Microsoft) Releases Evidence of Its Demise
We covered several such Friday announcements earlier this year
Gemini Links 24/10/2026: Break/Fix and OpenStreetMap
Links for the day
Links 23/10/2026: Slop "is Scaling Transnational Repression" and Infringement and DMCA Suits Against Suno/Anthropic (Plagiarism Blenders)
Links for the day
More Shutdowns at Microsoft, Hundreds of Workers Impacted Shortly
It's not the entire wave, just part of it
The Register MS: About 60 Mentions of "AI" in One Day Are Paid-for Spam (Sponsored Hype, Composed by the Companies Covered)
The Register MS is a dying site
Links 22/10/2026: MElon (Elon Musk) Election Interference and Perl/Raku Foundation by the Numbers
Links for the day
Techrights Audience Grew as a Function of the Intensity of Attacks on Its Existence
We try to publish fewer stories but better (not necessarily long but at least important) stories
TechRepublic is Becoming a Slopfarm
It seems like TechRepublic became LLM slop (maybe all of it, maybe only some of it for now)
Techrights is Not About GNU/Linux, Tux Machines Is
When we say "GNU/Linux" we emphasise the GNU
The World Needs Activists With Social Skills and Perseverance
An everyday activist makes life better for everybody, everywhere (not for personal gain or even credit)
Intercontinental Brigading - Part XII - Lawfare to Cover Up Microsoft's Restricted Boot Calamity (Microsoft as Authority Over Linux), Garrett Wants to Talk About Penises Instead
When lawsuits become a political weapon
Without Microsoft's Monopoly (and Monopoly Rents) the Inevitable Microsoft Mass Layoffs Carry on Endlessly
Microsoft Windows is not retaining the dominance it once had
IBM's Debt Grew About $2 Billion in 3 Months
The silent layoffs still seem to impact Red Hat
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Thursday, October 22, 2026
IRC logs for Thursday, October 22, 2026