Bonum Certa Men Certa

Battistelli and His Bodyguards: Paranoia, Megalomania, or Both? Are China-Style 'Suicide Nets' Next on the EPO's Agenda?

Battistelli's vision of the EPO is extremely grim

Foxconn suicide nets
Photo credit: Gizmodo



Summary: A look back (about a dozen years) to the days of Benoît Battistelli walking around with bodyguards whilst only a French officer at INPI

THERE are a lot of things that EPO staff does not know. The flow of information is impeded by an atmosphere of terror, which is a top-down thing (imposed from the above, i.e. from the management).



"I noticed some references to Battistelli's bodyguards in your articles on TechRights," one reader told us. "It seems that Battistelli's penchant for bodyguards pre-dates his current job at the EPO."

Battistelli had every window frame in EPO buildings screwed shut.”
      --Anonymous
Our reader continued: "I recently came across a humourous French blog post from 2004 which reports on Battistelli's public debut as Director-General of the French Institut Nationale de la Propriété Industrielle (INPI) at the "Enjeux Press Preview" which took place on Monday, July 5, 2004. At the end of the report, it is mentioned that on that occasion Battistelli was accompanied by two bodyguards.

"The French blog post by Jean-Bernard Condat [from Paris] can be found here. I add an English translation [PDF] which attempts to capture the whimsical humour of the original. Feel free to share it with your readers!"

Under Battistelli, the EPO looks rather reminiscent of a war zone. He even uses war-type language to keep the staff under control, as if he is fighting a large legion of terrorists with weapons of mass destruction. His staff's representatives he simply called "Mafia". Well, it sure seems like if there's a combative element inside the EPO, this is something that Battistelli brought into the EPO rather than inherited from Brimelow, his predecessor. This isn't leadership; it's monarchy; it's repressive. To quote parts of the PDF (which incorporates pictures and more):

Benoît Battistelli, the new Director-General of the INPI, makes his public debut



[...]

BATTISTELLI remains unperturbed and replies that "he is not personally an ayatollah of IP rights for SMEs".

[...]

BATTISTELLI rises to depart and his two bodyguards follow him. The concert is over.


"Battistelli had every window frame in EPO buildings screwed shut," one person told us recently. "That is how he "prevents" further on-site suicides. No more jumping out of windows. But colleagues mutilate themselves in their offices now. Battistelli dislikes the bloody mess they leave behind. He decided to silence them by starting an investigation procedure against them. Once the procedure started, employees do not have the right to talk about any detail. He must know better - this is a time bomb."

It's like those anti-suicide nets in Foxconn (China). "They are not actually solving the issue," as my wife put it when I asked her about it, they're just "implementing a workaround."

“Never murder a man who is committing suicide.”

--Woodrow Wilson



Recent Techrights' Posts

Plagiarism is Hardly a New Problem, It Predates Mainstream Media Getting Paid to Whitewash It as "Training" or "Hey Hi", Then Conflate Plagiarism With "Intelligence" or Deferred "Value"
"Quantum" isn't new either; it's a 'circle-jerk' for companies without direction, only hype
 
Gemini Links 10/09/2026: "I Don’t Want to Interact With Stochastic Parrots" and "ROOPHLOCH 2026!"
Links for the day
What the British School Closure (BSN Senior School Leidschenveen) Means to EPO Staff
The only European thing about the EPO is the staff
Standing in Solidarity With Matt Mullenweg
I don't trust the people and companies that want Mullenweg out. Neither should you.
Links 10/09/2026: "Smear Campaign Says Anti-Flock Movement Is Chinese Propaganda" and "Flock Employee Calls Cops on Reporter Filming Them"
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Wednesday, September 09, 2026
IRC logs for Wednesday, September 09, 2026
IBM's Senior VP of Infrastructure is Out, Silent Layoffs Still Going On
Some people imagine the CEO will also "retire" very soon (and "ahead of time")
Gemini Links 09/09/2026: Mechanical Cameras, "Super App", and Prusa Issues
Links for the day
SLAPP Censorship - Part 177 Out of 200: Manosphere Without Financial Transparency
It has moreover replaced a female worker with a male
Deadline Tomorrow (10th of September) to Appeal the EPO's Fleecing of Staff (Union to Make Legal Challenges)
Join them. Fight the good fight.
linuxstans.com Died, Then Came Back as Slop (LLM Junk)
Don't make the mistake or the assumption that merely 'dabbling in' or 'experimenting with' LLMs can be forgivable as it is a trust destroyer
Links 09/09/2026: GAFAM Fatalities in Miami International Airport, "Britain’s Health Crisis Is Becoming a Political Crisis"
Links for the day
Gemini Links 09/09/2026: "Adjective Is Subjective" and Walled Gardens
Links for the day
Links 09/09/2026: Airport 'Down' (Glasgow and Edinburgh), 'Open' 'AI' Losses Rise to Pace of 50 Billion Dollars in Losses Per Year
Links for the day
Unsafe at Any Speed, "Modern" Appliances
Appliances have gotten worse
SLAPP Censorship - Part 176 Out of 200: The Sex-Obsessed Non-Experts
We heard some sexual stories
European Patent Office (EPO): No Transparency and No Paper Trail
The incompetence is that of the management, i.e. sheer incompetence of people who never examined a patent in their entire lifetime
Gemini Links 09/09/2026: Going Out, Smartphone Addiction, Mapping the Geminispace
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Tuesday, September 08, 2026
IRC logs for Tuesday, September 08, 2026
Linux is Sabotaged by Botspam and Bloat (de Facto Denial of Service Attack in "Intelligence" Clothing After Rust in "Security" Clothing)
Linux is becoming orphaned, devalued and diluted by GAFAM slop
Switzerland No Longer Wants Microsoft's 'Swiss Cheese' (Back Doors)
Switzerland's patience with Microsoft is wearing thin
Debian is Not a Community, Many Debian Developers Work for Large Companies Including GAFAM (US)
"Community" sounds like friendship and amicability
Links 08/09/2026: Slop Companies Attack Some More Sites, Nvidia Bribes 'Linux' Foundation for Some More Openwashing and for Saying Slop is "Secure"
Links for the day
Gemini Links 08/09/2026: Ultra Introverts, BlackBerry Bold in 2026, and Laughing at LLMs
Links for the day
Microsoft Layoffs in October 2026
Microsoft is a market leader. In NDAs.
Links 08/09/2026: "The Green Revolution Has Failed Africa" and Palantir/Microsoft Harming NHS
Links for the day
Microsoft's Silent Layoffs Are the New Normal at Microsoft
Microsoft has a ton of layoffs all the time, but the media isn't mentioning those as no WARN notices get issued
SLAPP Censorship - Part 175 Out of 200: Implicit and Explicit Coalition Against the UK's SLAPP Industry
SRA recognises the problem
Further Transparency Problems at the EPO
The EPO was never meant to be profitable
Gemini Links 08/09/2026: "Everything Must Go", Announcing Perigee, and Presentations in a Browser
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Monday, September 07, 2026
IRC logs for Monday, September 07, 2026