Guest-authored

Summary: An EPO outline of recent events, courtesy of readers

PD 43 Bergot's latest "cunning plan"

You may not believe it, but this is true stuff: visibly totally disconnected from reality (or perhaps under medication which alters her perception of our world), Mrs Bergot recently organised two sessions in Munich and The Hague to gather staff recently recruited (many of whom are still in probation period), for a rather challenging task: convince new comers to abandon their permanent employment conditions and instead accept a time limited contract!

And to motivate them (hahahaha) the only "benefit" that PD 43 was capable to propose to them was (and this is no joke): should these staff members decease prematurely, with a time-limited contract their survivors will receive a lump sum higher by 2% compared with the one paid for permanent staff.

A truly killing deal, is it not?

Obviously this is pure non-sense but at this stage of her Amoklauf, Mrs Bergot fears nothing, no one and can safely make herself a fool in public without fear (the rumour has it trusted circles that Mr Campinos is considering keeping her as PD HR since the fear factor makes EPO staff produce like hell and if he were to remove her, production figures may fall).

Of course as can reasonably expected, the members of staff gathered (euphemism for summoned) by the Grande Dame des HR did not believe what they were given to hear and no one accepted the "offer".

More pressure by DG1 management on examiners in probation

Currently DG1 Directors have been instructed by their PDs (and as can be expected from servants, they act zealously to satisfy their masters) to refuse (yes you read well REFUSE) examiners in probation to take their accrued holidays.

Why this? Because if examiners are off they cannot produce and targets cannot be met. Logical. As a result many new comers now sincerely consider leaving the EPO.

Well done Bergot et al.! Not only do they fail to attract top profiles any more (due to both EPO's terrible reputation on the work market coupled to far less attractive working conditions due Bergot et al. new policies) but now they even manage to motivate the few who got in to leave the EPO!

Sincerely we can only advise newcomers to run away before they become unemployable somewhere else, and they the longer they stay at EPO, the more unemployable they are.

Also from reliable sources, DG1 team leaders currently receive training from DG4 staff about how to “interpret” the Codex (read refuse), to avoid complying with legitimate requests by examiners who ask for special leave enshrined in the EPO Codex as rights (eg for sickness of a child, a spouse etc. Obviously the first ones who are affected (and cannot protest without compromising their future) are probationers and staff under contract.

Who said that EPO HR is anti-personnel?

Negative feedback upon Campinos: more of the same in sight?

Over the past 6 years, the EPO has been severely affected by the current top management team but it might continue to be destroyed big time under Campinos, due to the level of "competency" of those in charge.

Indeed from reliable sources, Campinos seems to fear that if he changes the current team (responsible for the mess we know), production figures will plummet and he will look like the one responsible for the drop.

As a result, Campinos is thus said to consider keeping them (e.g. Bergot, Chabod, Bauer etc) at their current positions or swap posts between them (!) so that with the "fear factor" going-on as-is, production targets remain at their current unhealthy levels.

Only a “detail” - which no one may have had the guts to bring to Mr Campinos’ attention: the level of exhaustion of EPO staff and with it, the genuine risk for new suicides (hundreds of EPO staff office-wide are currently in psy-related therapies to hold the pressure they face at their EPO desks).

If this feedback materializes, then Campinos – who was first selected with on its agenda as highest priority: restore social peace – will just be another bureaucratic puppet, incapable of taking real managerial decisions to preserve the interests of both the Organisation and Public, and EPO staff will remain parts of a mechanic which are to be thrown away when defect.

Legitimate reward of a true talent

Another "Good News": Sebastian Bauer who first worked in Investigation Unit (rebranded - don't die laughing - "Ethics and Compliance") as an investigator.

Always prone to serve his master Elodie Bergot whilst satisfying her most unhealthy wishes (e.g. Mr Bauer was heavily involved in the fake files generated by IU which served as basis to sanction several staff representatives and union officials (leading to several dismissals, downgrading etc), Bauer was recently promoted to Director level for his “good” performance.

But this was not the end of his success story yet: Now Mr Bauer has just been promoted Principal Director ad interim of Dpt. Ethics and Compliance (internally branded by EPO Staff as STASI) following the retirement of the previous PD.

Who said that true talents are not rewarded at EPO? ⬆