Bonum Certa Men Certa

The EPO's 'Investigative' Function is Totally Out of Control and Continues to Get Bigger, Whitewashed by So-called 'Review'

Like his political ilk in France, Battistelli is a "big government" proponent who does not mind even torturing people (as if his personal ends justify the means)

Gestapomen following the white buses



Summary: An update on the situation which still causes great unrest at the European Patent Office (EPO), namely abuse of staff by the so-called Investigative Unit (Eponia's equivalent of unaccountable secret services)

An article about the EPO's Investigative Unit has been long overdue. It's like the goons or thugs of the Office, or the militant guards of Team Battistelli, which are complemented by a fleet of bodyguards in spite of low threat levels. Staff is subjected to scans as though it is boarding a plane and sometimes subjected to psychological torture. Almost everyone we hear from says that working for the EPO is a nightmare if not torture; some seriously think about leaving. They can't take it anymore. It wasn't always the case; Battistelli made it so. Over the past couple of years the EPO has been acting like a frightened state with secret services and armed bodyguards, not like a public service or institution. We already published a series of articles about it last year [1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7]. Nothing at all has changed for the better; in fact, things have gotten even worse. Things continue to exacerbate and lying has become so chronic that next month there will be a whole "report" and "conference" to tell the world that EPO staff is happy. Even North Korea has not yet stooped this low...



"External quality review of the EPO investigative function" was not too long ago sought by particular EPO workers. "The administration has started an "external quality review of the EPO investigative function"," they wrote, and one "can find an in-depth analysis of the investigation guidelines and the functioning of the Unit..."

We have made a local copy of it [PDF]. The document is 14 pages long so we haven't converted it to HTML. Instead, "short observations on the review process" can be found below:

Investigating the EPO Investigative Unit - a peer review?



Introduction When the Investigation Guidelines were adopted, a review was foreseen after three years, i.e. early 2015. At the time Mr Battistelli did not seem interested. That has changed: in its December meeting the Administrative Council insisted on a review, not only of the Guidelines but also of the Unit itself. Ms Bergot has now informed the CSC that an external review of the EPO quality function will soon take place. That could be good news, or it could be a white-washing exercise.

External review of the WIPO Investigation Function Interestingly, a very similar review has taken place in WIPO only half a year ago. The external reviewers were a “senior investigation officer” from an UN organization, Mr Sébastien Godefroid and Mr Claudio Zanghi, head of the EPO Investigative Unit. The EPO Investigative Unit is hardly a best practice example. Maybe not surprisingly the report recommends strengthening the WIPO Investigative Unit by hiring staff, providing less information to the accused, and making access to electronic data easier. Data protection issues are not even mentioned in the report.

External review of the EPO Investigation Function The two external reviewers selected by the EPO are Mr James Finniss, who is currently Deputy Director of the Investigation Division of the UN Office of Internal Oversight Services (OIOS), and Ms Olivia Graham who is Ethics Officer at the International Monetary Fund, i.e. both are working for international governmental organisations. This almost certainly means that the standards applied will be those common in such organisations. Almost all international organisations show a lack of transparency (excess demands of confidentiality), a lack of accountability (no truly independent overview, immunity of suit) and a lack of respect for staff rights (fundamental rights, labour rights, data protection e.a.). The circle of investigators working in international organisations is furthermore rather small. They form a rather tight-knitted community: they regularly visit each other, meet at conferences etc. To have this relatively small group of people assessing each other in turn would not seem the best way to guarantee independence.


To quote from the corresponding PDF:

The application of Circular No. 342 in practice has confirmed fears expressed by staff representatives prior to its introduction. The Circular has been used to transform the EPO into a "police state". The most relevant issues in this regard are summarised in the present document. In particular, it is noted that investigators are immune from any independent external control or oversight and there is no effective means for holding them to account for any irregular or otherwise disproportionate actions involving breaches of internal EPO regulations or national law.



Regarding so-called investigators -- the ones whose jobs were advertised almost a year ago -- a couple more got hired and "the general reaction is," according to a source of ours is: "Hell, another bunch of parasites we have to feed" (people who produce nothing).

Big government, eh?

"The boards of appeal," our source added, "will lose some relatively young members due to retiring." We guess they know what's coming. We don't think there are any job openings advertised at present for the boards. This, perhaps, is just what Battistelli prefers. As the UPC won't happen (at least not any time soon), Battistelli is now stuck between a rock and a hard place. The Office is collapsing and there's no remedy. They're scaring away all the skilled people and are unable to recruit equally-skilled replacements. Europe will suffer. ⬆

Recent Techrights' Posts

Things Not to Measure in Quantity Alone
More patents do not beget greater innovation
SLAPP Censorship - Part 199 Out of 200: An American Burden on the British Legal System
A year ago (October 2025) the head of media (Jointly in Charge of the Media and Communications List), the judge in the Garrett case, said that this case was a waste of the court's money
Criminalising Opposition to Fraud
slop causes social issues
 
SLAPP Censorship - Part 200 Out of 200: Will GNU Boot Undo the Technical Damage Caused by Microsoft and Garrett? (And Garrett's Litigation Allies From Microsoft)
Today we publish the final part of this series
US Government Sites Can Now Totally Ignore Mozilla Firefox Users or Users of Firefox Derivatives
Firefox, now at 1.1% in the US (based on American government sites), has sunken to the point of no return
Even Microsoft Boosters Start to Doubt XBox Will Exist (It's Being Phased Out, Just Not "Officially")
This is how to phase out a business unit without officially saying so (as it might alarm investors)
Omarchy is Built on the Idea That Slop is Desirable (It's Not)
They call bots and plagiarism "agents" and "training"
IBM is Shrinking Very Fast (Silent, Unannounced Layoffs)
IBM and Microsoft both avoid WARN notices by compelling staff to leave or silently removing them with some NDA
In Some Parts of Microsoft 50% of All Staff Subjected to Layoffs, Media Pretends Only 0.1% of Staff Are Removed
This really says a lot about the state of today's so-called 'media'
EPO Management Wants Everything to be Done in Microsoft Spyware
In reality, this management should be ousted for normalising cocaine at the Office
The Register MS Does Not Properly Flag Its SPAM About Slop
Signs of desperation
Gemini Links 25/09/2026: Ljubljana, Tanana River, and Curse of Slack
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Thursday, September 24, 2026
IRC logs for Thursday, September 24, 2026
Supporters of winding-up process staking claims against Reform UK Party (CR-2026-007405)
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
Winding-up petition leaked before service on Reform UK Party Limited / Nigel Farage
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
Gemini Links 24/09/2026: Laziness, Outdoor Seating, "AngelNova’s Interview Malware and Its North Korea Connection"
Links for the day
Links 24/09/2026: Slop "Linked to Disturbing Culture of Sexual Assault"; "Zelensky Warns Russia’s War Will Expand if It Is Not Ended Soon"
Links for the day
Winding-up petition served on Reform UK Party Limited (Nigel Farage)
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
Appliances Should be Dumb
Any "Smart Home Appliance" is basically a thing that does not last long, does not work as advertised, and is generally unfit for purpose
SLAPP Censorship - Part 198 Out of 200: It Sounds Like Garrett is Now Sending People to Silence Critics (Including His Own Spouse)
This week Garrett is having a somewhat karmic experience
Links 24/09/2026: Slop Contaminating KDE, Slop-Focused Data Centres Have Severe Environmental Impact
Links for the day
SLAPP Censorship - Part 197 Out of 200: Garrett Became So Poor That He Wants Others (in Another Continent) to Pay for His Own Legal Work Being Faulty
They lie to courts
The Register MS Has Become a Slopfest
This is the behaviour of a perishing publisher
Gemini Links 24/09/2026: Requiem for a Season, Philosophy, Rube-Goldberg Machine, ROOPHLOCH 2026, and Git over Gemini
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Wednesday, September 23, 2026
IRC logs for Wednesday, September 23, 2026
IBM Grapevine: Development Outsourced to LLM Slop and It Results in Many Bugs
IBM is circling down the drain and every insider knows it
Microsoft Gives Many People the 'Booty' This Week, Not Counting PIPs (Silent Layoffs and 'Voluntary' Layoffs)
Microsoft PIPs allegedly target "20-25% in some teams."
Nearly 1,000 People at EPO 'Met' to Plan Further Strikes and Impending Action to Dethrone Corrupt Leadership
Exploring the purchasing "power" of EPO leadership (buying elections while doing cocaine in public)
Links 23/09/2026: Pax Silica Hub Ruins a Country for a Pyramid Scheme (Slop), Convicted Felon's Press Block Resembles Iran, Russia, China
Links for the day
Gemini Links 23/09/2026: Stuck, Gambling, Fury Road, IPFS, and More
Links for the day
The Register Got Paid Today to Spew Out "AI" Almost 50 Times (Keeping the Pyramid Scheme Buzzing in Headlines)
paid-for spam
SLAPP Censorship - Part 196 Out of 200: Sending Someone to Our Doorstep to Ship Approximately 5 KG of Legal Papers (Instead of to Our Representatives)
it is not about law, this is lawfare
IBM's Anderon Already Smells Like a Fraud and IBM Insiders Heckle the Lies From the Management
Sabine Hossenfelder recently made some videos which explain in simple terms why IBM is lying and has already lied about this for years
Links 23/09/2026: Mass-Surveillance by Clownflare and "Data Centre" Crunch Commences
Links for the day
Same Name/Brand, Not the Same Project/Product
What is Linux becoming?
Germany, Like Switzerland, Will Dump Microsoft's Proprietary Software and Disservices, Then Dump Windows for GNU/Linux
This impacts not only the Windows revenue; this corrodes any "rents" Microsoft was getting from "subscriptions"
3 Years Divorced From Americans
Next year we plan to pursue the UK's Court of Appeal
The Register MS Uses Slop About Slop (in Images)
Months ago we caught The Register MS using slop for text as well
There Are Likely Over a Thousand Internet Relay Chat (IRC) Networks Online, Net Gain of 16 Seen This Month by Andreas Gelhausen's netsplit.de
It's good that they're still tracking that sort of stuff
SLAPP Censorship - Part 195 Out of 200: Two Years Since Garrett, Graveley and Lozza Worked in Parallel to Censor Techrights
It began in September 2024, shortly after we had sued Garrett
Linux Kernel Becoming a Slopfest - Part 8 - In Conclusion
this can invite more SCO-like problems in the future
Microsoft Shuts Down More Studios, Morale Low, More Mass Layoffs Ahead of Reports
They pretend it's not happening or that it's a lot smaller than it actually is
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Tuesday, September 22, 2026
IRC logs for Tuesday, September 22, 2026
Gemini Links 23/09/2026: Ljubljana, Poetry, and FORTRAN
Links for the day