Bonum Certa Men Certa

Shut Up and Learn to Maintain an Application Suite

Article by YOU Can Call Me "Mr. Developer" Actually, You Can Call Me "SIR Mr. Developer"



Summary: "Try and maintain a complex piece of software like a browser or an office suite, and then you'll understand."

Ah, the good old days... People used to complain, and we would tell them to stop snivelling and learn to code.



Now they pretend that even Free Software can do unethical things. Where do they get these ridiculous ideas?

Free Software can't be unethical. You can always change the code, so PLEASE stop whinging about how it "spies" on you or got your dog pregnant -- we seriously don't care. We are just volunteers.

I know there was this guy -- Shopman? Schtolman? Wait, Torvalds! He used to talk about something like this, but seriously, who codes in a bathrobe?

Google Street View logs WiFi networks, Mac addressesYou never hear Greg talking about that kind of nonsense. I mean, he's too busy coding (and putting on some clothes first.)

But the rest of you, for crying out loud -- just because "stuff happens" on your side and we get "data" about it on our side, doesn't make it "spyware" -- we aren't spies. As I said, we are just volunteers.

You don't understand ethics because you probably don't write any code. I mean you say you do, you even showed us your GitHub repo, but you certainly haven't written any code for us, so we don't expect you to understand.

I don't mean anything by it, you know -- when I laughed at you on Twitter, I didn't say you were "crazy" or "stupid", just LOL. If we can't laugh, that's a serious problem. Then again, so is all this (frankly, very uninformed) whinging.

"But the rest of you, for crying out loud -- just because "stuff happens" on your side and we get "data" about it on our side, doesn't make it "spyware" -- we aren't spies. As I said, we are just volunteers."Sometimes we sell data to Google. It's not YOUR data, it's OUR data. We're the ones who found it. Yes, we wrote code for your browser to send it to us.

You can turn it off, you know. Just go to about:config and click "Yes I'm sure", then agree to the EULA and email us a letter stating that you understand and agree to proper usage of our trademarks, then click "Show All settings" and add the key "browser.surveillance.telemetry.justkidding.spyonusmaybe" and set it to string value "0x3b338912" and we won't send any data in until we think of another way to make you even MORE free.

I don't think you people get why we do this stuff. It's all to help us help YOU. And this is the thanks we get!

When we sell the data, we also put that into helping YOU. But first we print it all out and go at your personal information really firmly with a rubber. Your privacy is totally safe!

Didn't you learn anything when people tried to say that Ubuntu Unity Amazon Lens was spyware? Mark Shuttleworth explained all this, he said that if you trust Canonical with root access then obviously, you're giving them permission to do whatever -- and if you gave them permission, you shouldn't complain. And that's what trust is all about!

So really, we aren't even asking for root access. Just sending some data from your software to our servers which is absolutely and in every way perfectly useless for indicating anything that you're doing in a way that could you know, somehow "track" what you're doing. Just think of it as random numbers, alright? Random numbers that aren't at all important.

"Sometimes we sell data to Google. It's not YOUR data, it's OUR data. We're the ones who found it. Yes, we wrote code for your browser to send it to us."What I'd like to see is any of you whingers and peons try to maintain your own web browser, alright? I mean, it looks easy, but it's really hard work! And then a bunch of uppity know-it-alls -- sorry, I mean you people start talking about "ethics" like we did something wrong! And they you say we are spying on you! We are a non-profit, Hello? EVERYTHING we do is ethical.

Try and maintain a complex piece of software like a browser or an office suite, and then you'll understand.

Until then, PLEASE just shut up already, it's not helping anything. Turn off your computer and go put your tinfoil hats on, but don't bother us with a bunch of silly nonsense. Come back when you want to contribute some code, or help pay for our time, when you've grown up a little.

Thanks!

"Try and maintain a complex piece of software like a browser or an office suite, and then you'll understand."Also, by all means, please feel free to copy and share this with your other loser friends who have nothing better to do than complain all the time.

Yours Sincerely,

Fed Up Developer Tired Of All The Whinging

(Sir Fed Up Developer Tired Of All The Whinging, to you.)

Public Domain

Recent Techrights' Posts

Microsoft Whistleblowers Explain How Brutal the Latest Cull is (Layoffs in Seconds-Long Calls, Mass Elimination of Whole Studios and High-Level Officials)
we see anonymous leakers or whistleblowers in the media today
 
Links 17/07/2026: Microsoft is Cutting OneDrive Coverage, Larry Ellison Sued by Paramount Investor
Links for the day
Nichirei and Asahi Beer Need to Take Cyberattacks as Hint of Opportunity to Move to Free Software
Windows TCO
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Thursday, July 16, 2026
IRC logs for Thursday, July 16, 2026
Gemini Links 17/07/2026: Sunlight in the Clouds, Techno-Therapy, and Sloppifying Original Text
Links for the day
Links 16/07/2026: Slop Recognised as a Waste of Energy, Hong Kong Cracking Down on Dissent/Opposition Some More
Links for the day
GNU/Linux Approaching 5% "Market Share" in Oceania, Almost Trebling in 12 Months
It is difficult to ignore the gains made by GNU/Linux this month
Gemini Links 16/07/2026: esp32-gemserv, Slop-Contaminated Free Software, and Moving Systems
Links for the day
Last Summer Microsoft Mass Layoffs Came in Two Large Waves, Rumours Say Next Week Another Large Wave is Coming
If many more Microsoft layoffs are formally admitted next week we will not be surprised
Tomorrow is Another Strike Day at Europe's Second-Largest Institution, the Media is Still Deliberately Ignoring It
Fridays are now recommended “anchor days" for EPO strikes
Public Interest News Foundation Shows News Drought or News Deserts in the United Kingdom
Public Interest News Foundation shows that we should be deeply concerned
Illusions of Choice
Choices can be differently bad or equally bad
Windows Down to 10% in India
Windows is a "burning platform"
One Year Has Passed
Our aim is to repair an injured system wherein "abuse of process" can be turned into a weapon, leveraged even by foreigners who are funded by affluent third parties
Techrights is Annoying People Who Work for (and Serve) People Who Annoy (and Abuse) Society
Working against us (instead of with us) has historically been a bad strategy
No Skinnerboxes, No Slop, No False Idols or Corporate Prophets
Torvalds does not understand the everyday struggles of tech workers and tech users because he is a millionaire
IBM's Next Stop: $199 (Market Cap Already Under 2.5 Times IBM's Debt)
Don't rush to call us "sensationalist" over it
Links 16/07/2026: Solar Greenwashing by Energy-Wasting GAFAM and Growing Concerns About Harm by Social Control Media
Links for the day
Gemini Links 16/07/2026: Photography, Agility, and "Today I have Truly Become a Linux User."
Links for the day
Rebellion Brewing at Microsoft
As always, we welcome Microsoft whistleblowers
Technology Against Human Nature
Losing a sense of what it means to be alive
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Wednesday, July 15, 2026
IRC logs for Wednesday, July 15, 2026
IBM Down to $211.20, the Market in General is Up
No recovery for IBM today
UEFI 'Secure Boot' Still Not Secure in 2026, New Holes (or Bypasses) Still Being Found
In 2026 there are still many people who call it "secure" and pretend to themselves that it is about security. It's not. It never was.
Gemini Links 15/07/2026: Lab 6, Retrospective 2, and "Getting Back Into Gemini"
Links for the day
Links 15/07/2026: "Gianni Infantino Under Fire" and "Todd Blanche's Record Raises Alarming Questions About the Future of the US DOJ"
Links for the day
Allegedly More IBM RAs (Mass Layoffs) Same Day the Stock Crashed
No paper trail, so it never happened, right?
Techrights Was Right: Microsoft's Layoffs Tally Was False, Far More People Are Being Sacked
"The Xbox Bloodbath Is Actually Way Bigger Than It Seems"
Get Ready for Increase in PIPs and RAs at IBM, Red Hat, and Other Companies Devoured by IBM
IBM's "market cap" has just fallen to 199 billion dollars and it has about 70 billion dollars in debt
IBM Sinking to Lowest Levels Since 2024, But Will Any Executives Be Arrested for Securities Fraud?
52-week high of $332.46 and now down to $212.94
Microsoft Whistleblowers Say "The Entire Thing is Going to Fall Apart" and There Are "No Benefits" to Being Part of Microsoft
"Multiple sources, who chose to remain anonymous for fear of reprisal"
IBM's Crash Continues Today
Stocks go up and down, but they don't typically go down by over 25% in a single day
Like Kyndryl, Multiple Securities Fraud Investigations Into IBM
Remember what happened to Kyndryl
How Long Before GNU/Linux is Measured at 20% in Chad?
The main way to get people to adopt Vista 11 is to sell them a new PCs and in poor countries it happens a lot less
Making Techrights Faster Down Under (Australia and New Zealand)
there's more to life than speed
Strikes at the EPO Approved for the Rest of the Year, "€1,3 Billion Taken From Staff Income"
Intensity can be revised and increased over time
Focusing on What We Really Ought to Focus on
Today we'll focus mostly on EPO affairs
Violence is Not a Joke
"Police say Widdecombe killing was targeted but motive remains unclear"
How to Properly Measure the Performance of a Patent Office
A "contribution from staff [which] is published by SUEPO Munich."
Who Next After IBM? (Bubbles Don't Last Forever)
the demise of companies with "ai" in their name/domain
EPO "Cocaine Communication Manager" - Part XIV - "Not One of Us" (How the Group Dubbed by EPO Insiders "Alicante Mafia" Pushes Out Talent, Replacing It With Friends)
misuses the EPO's budget like it is a fountain of money for his friends
LibreTech Collective Abandons Microsoft GitHub and All Other Proprietary Software
Each time a project eliminates control by a hostile party it stands to gain
GNU/Linux Estimated at 8% "Market Share" Today (in statCounter)
Days ago it said 7.1%, then 7.3% or 7.4%
Links 15/07/2026: US Regime "Cuts Two Utah National Monuments by More Than 90%", "Hormuz is Less Crucial Than It Was"
Links for the day
Gemini Links 15/07/2026: Old Computer Challenge, "Trial by Fire", LLM Slop Destroying Companies
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Tuesday, July 14, 2026
IRC logs for Tuesday, July 14, 2026