EditorsAbout the SiteComes vs. MicrosoftUsing This Web SiteSite ArchivesCredibility IndexOOXMLOpenDocumentPatentsNovellNews DigestSite NewsRSS

03.31.08

OpenSUSE Sheds Off Its Novell Antiroots, Returns to Pre-Novell Codebase, Version 4.01

Posted in GNU/Linux, Humour, Microsoft, Mono, Novell, OpenSUSE, Patent Covenant, Patents, SLES/SLED, Windows at 9:35 pm by Dr. Roy Schestowitz

Hot off the press:

Microsoft and Novell Announce Departure of OpenSUSE Project, Renewed Patent Strategy

Customers will continue to embrace SUSE Windows Enterprise; technical collaboration between Microsoft and Novell will expand Windows Vista distribution to create Windows 7

REDMOND, Wash., and WALTHAM, Mass. — Apr. 1, 2008 — Over one year after signing an agreement to exchange protection money and securing several kneecaps, Novell Inc. and Microsoft Corp. today announced that OpenSUSE developers had reached a state of unrest. As such, Microsoft and Novell decided to revise their strategic partnership and combine the best of two platforms’ intellectual property, protected by an extensive portfolio of valuable patents.

The two companies will continue to swap intellectual property (IP) and create Microsoft Windows 7, accompanied by a derivative release named SUSE Windows, ensuring that OpenSUSE developers, formerly of SuSE, can continue to develop GNU/Linux solutions with peace of mind. In addition, Novell and Microsoft announced an expansion of their strategic collaboration to create the Oligarchy Invention Network (OIN), whose purpose is to litigate — albeit by proxy — against disruptive technologies whose market cost is zero.

“This agreement has been about Novell’s shareholder since day one,” said Jam Jaffe, executive vile precedence at Novell. “Investors told us they wanted to indulge in the wealth that was built around Windows. Novell is also becoming the preferred patent troll for litigation strategies against companies which refuse to pay for imaginary property and unsubstantiated claims.”

Achievements to Date

Today Novell and Microsoft announced that 15 new customers, including SCO (Nasdaq: SCOX), have sought the services of the joint collaboration, whose potential in spreading fear is immense. “I have been looking for such opportunities for over 5 years,” said Darl McBride, whose expected departure was wrongly announced by the press in the month of February.

Novell concluded by assuring technical enthusiasts that their GNU/Linux* distribution will be stripped of most or all of Novell’s contributions to it, in order to avoid further legal damage and threat over frameworks such as Mono. “The hobbyists were not exactly what we needed at Novell anyway,” summarised Just in Stein at the press conference announcing this major development.

About Novell

Novell, Inc. (Nasdaq: NOVL) delivers infrastructure software for the Patent-happy Enterprise. Novell is a leader in desktop to data center operating systems based on Ballnux and the software required to secure and manage mixed IT environments. Novell helps customers around the world minimize cost, complexity and risk, allowing them to focus on innovation and growth. For more information, visit www.novell.com.

About Microsoft

Founded in 1975, Microsoft (Nasdaq “MSFT”) is the worldwide leader in bribery, extortion and blackmail that help people and businesses realize their full potential.

Novell and SUSE are registered trademarks of Novell Inc. in the United States and other countries.

* Linux is a registered trademark of Linus Torvalds.

SUSE manuals

Hint for the baffled: I wasn’t really hired by Microsoft a year ago today.

Share this post: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages.
  • Digg
  • del.icio.us
  • Reddit
  • co.mments
  • DZone
  • email
  • Google Bookmarks
  • LinkedIn
  • NewsVine
  • Print
  • Technorati
  • TwitThis
  • Facebook

If you liked this post, consider subscribing to the RSS feed or join us now at the IRC channels.

Pages that cross-reference this one

11 Comments

  1. Felipe said,

    March 31, 2008 at 10:32 pm

    Gravatar

    Happy april fools!

  2. CoolGuy said,

    April 1, 2008 at 12:10 am

    Gravatar

    Linus is now working for Microsoft on Windows 7 due to come out next year…

  3. Roy Schestowitz said,

    April 1, 2008 at 12:26 am

    Gravatar

    Over at the Dot (KDE), it’s reported that KDE representatives voted “Yes” to OOXML. It had me fooled for a moment.

    http://dot.kde.org/1207000153/

  4. Petem said,

    April 1, 2008 at 9:15 am

    Gravatar

    MAN… you got me..!! i totally forgot this is april 1st…. for a minute, i thought novell was actually committing suicide…

  5. Roy Schestowitz said,

    April 1, 2008 at 9:18 am

    Gravatar

    i thought novell was actually committing suicide…

    Naa… that was over a year ago. :-p

    http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docId=6117892236984943124&hl=en

  6. MrLinux said,

    April 1, 2008 at 9:18 am

    Gravatar

    Funny – not.

  7. Victor Soliz said,

    April 1, 2008 at 10:37 am

    Gravatar

    Funny minus not equals Funy-o-t ?

  8. Roy Schestowitz said,

    April 1, 2008 at 11:27 am

    Gravatar

    Hmmm… interesting. A couple of hours ago I received the following E-mail, which seems to borrow similar ideas.


    [opensuse-announce] openSUSE 4.1 available


    The openSUSE team proudly announces the availability of openSUSE 4.1.

    We’re shipping all the latest open source packages that are available at time
    of launch. As highlights, we’d like to point out the latest desktops, GNOME
    4.1 and KDE 4.1 plus KDE 4.2 preview, our MP41 support via gstreamer plug-in
    by Fluendo, a faster boot process, heavily optimised and improved package
    management, 1-click install option for additional software, OpenOffice 4.1,
    XEN 4.1 and VirtualBox 4.1 and, last but not least, our 4 in 1 CD installation
    which provides a small but fully loaded desktop. For all the news and
    impressive screenshots, have a look at http://news.opensuse.org/?p=412008

    It’s available now to download at http://software.openSUSE.org in Amstrad,
    Commodore, Kaypro and TRS-80 versions – from our mirrors and via bittorrent.

    The following ISOs can be downloaded: the 1 CD open source version with an
    add-on CD containing proprietary software, such as iTunes,
    World of Warcraft, and Microsoft Office for Linux. DVD ISOs for all
    architectures are available and contain the open source version plus
    proprietary add-ons. An installable Live CD will be released in October, and
    the Edu add-on CD http://en.opensuse.org/Education will show up in the same
    time frame.

    As usual, openSUSE 4.1 will be available in European retail channels as a
    boxed product Of course, there it will be known as openSUSE 1.4. All software
    versions contained will follow. In North America, the box will be available
    through shopNovell http://shop.novell.com. Due to production lead times,
    boxes will start to show up on shelves when we feel like it.

    We’d like to take this opportunity to thank the whole openSUSE community for
    tons of testing, feedback, contributions and over all participation in
    helping to make openSUSE 4.1 an awesome distribution. While risking missing
    out some important contributors, we’d like to spotlight some
    community members for their outstanding work:

    Have a lot of fun!

    – openSUSE SUSE LINUX Products GmbH – Nürnberg – AG Nürnberg


  9. David said,

    April 1, 2008 at 11:19 pm

    Gravatar

    I can’t believe this web site is still around! Again, how come you idiots are not boycotting all the other distros/companies that made deals with M$? I thought by now, you would have realized that the 5 people that visited your site last month would be a hint for your to start revising those resumes of yours!

    This Roy joker that writes here, needs lessons about writing articles and doing some research. Granted I’ve only read two articles since they put up this site (too damn boring….) but that was enough to realize that these people (pro open source…. yeah right) have no clue as to what goes on in the market and just because you don’t like a company, doesn’t mean that their products are not good or that they’re not useful to others, which BTW, I must admit, we use in-house and will continue to use Novell’s products, they’re simply good.

    As for this site, I think these people who run it should get a clue and start thinking about doing something useful. This site is to computing what Esquire is to journalism…. s..t

    David

  10. Roy Schestowitz said,

    April 1, 2008 at 11:40 pm

    Gravatar

    I can’t believe this web site is still around! Again, how come you idiots are not boycotting all the other distros/companies that made deals with M$?

    Who said we don’t?

    http://boycottxandros.com
    http://boycottlinspire.com

    ..which BTW, I must admit, we use in-house and will continue to use Novell’s products, they’re simply good.

    That is an extremely common defense argument for the use of Microsoft Windows, despite all that we know.

  11. Tomari-chan said,

    April 2, 2008 at 7:51 am

    Gravatar

    I do believe it!

    After all, it’s always the same 4 guys spending their evenings here. Obviously they got nothing better to do than indulge in that hobby of theirs.

What Else is New


  1. The Crook Goes to Brussels to Lie About the Unitary Patent (UPC)

    The person who spent years lying about the UPC and severely attacking critics (usually by blatantly lying about them) goes to Brussels for another nose extension



  2. The EPO's HR Roadmap Retrospective

    A look back at the terrible ‘accomplishments’ of the Jesper Kongstad-led Administrative Council, which still issues hogwash and face-saving lies, as one might expect from a protector of Battistelli that lies to national representatives and buries inconvenient topics



  3. Links 26/3/2017: Debian Project Leader Elections, SecureDrop and Alexandre Oliva FSF Winners

    Links for the day



  4. His Master's Voice, Jesper Kongstad, Blocks Discussion of Investigative and Disciplinary Procedures at the EPO

    The Chairman of the Administrative Council of the European Patent Organisation is actively preventing not just the dismissal of Battistelli but also discussion of Battistelli's abuses



  5. Heiko Maas and the State of Germany Viewed as Increasingly Complicit in EPO Scandals and Toxic UPC Agenda

    It is becoming hard if not impossible to interpret silence and inaction from Maas as a form of endorsement for everything the EPO has been doing, with the German delegates displaying more of that apathy which in itself constitutes a form of complicity



  6. With IP Kat Coverage of EPO Scandals Coming to an End (Officially), Techrights and The Register Remain to Cover New Developments

    One final post about the end of Merpel’s EPO coverage, which is unfortunate but understandable given the EPO’s track record attacking the media, including blogs like IP Kat, sites of patent stakeholders, and even so-called media partners



  7. Everyone, Including Patent Law Firms, Will Suffer From the Demise of the EPO

    Concerns about quality of patents granted by the EPO (EPs) are publicly raised by industry/EPO insiders, albeit in an anonymous fashion



  8. Yes, Battistelli's Ban on EPO Strikes (or Severe Limitation Thereof) is a Violation of Human Rights

    Battistelli has curtailed even the right to strike, yet anonymous cowards attempt to blame the staff (as in patent examiners) for not going out of their way to engage in 'unauthorised' strikes (entailing dismissal)



  9. Even the EPO's Administrative Council No Longer Trusts Its Chairman, Battistelli's 'Chinchilla' Jesper Kongstad

    Kongstad's protection of Battistelli, whom he is supposed to oversee, stretches to the point where national representatives (delegates) are being misinformed



  10. Thanks to Merpel, the World Knows EPO Scandals a Lot Better, But It's a Shame That IP Kat Helped UPC

    A look back at Merpel's final post about EPO scandals and the looming threat of the UPC, which UPC opportunists such as Bristows LLP still try hard to make a reality, exploiting bogus (hastily-granted) patents for endless litigation all around Europe



  11. EPO Critics Threatened by Self-Censorship, Comment Censorship, and a Growing Threat to Anonymity

    Putting in perspective the campaign for justice at the EPO, which to a large degree relies on whistleblowers and thus depends a great deal on freedom of the press, freedom of speech, and anonymity



  12. Links 25/3/2017: Maru OS 0.4, C++17 Complete

    Links for the day



  13. Judge and Justice Bashing in the United States, EPC Bashing at the EPO

    Enforcement of the law based on constitutional grounds and based on the European Patent Convention (EPC) in an age of retribution and insults -- sometimes even libel -- against judges



  14. Looking for EPO Nepotism? Forget About Jouve and Look Closely at Europatis Instead.

    Debates about the contract of Jouve with the EPO overlook the elephants in the room, which include companies that are established and run by former EPO chiefs and enjoy a relationship with the EPO



  15. Depressing EPO News: Attacks on Staff, Attacks on Life, Brain Drain, Patents on Life, Patent Trolls Come to Germany, and Spain Being Misled

    A roundup of the latest developments at the EPO combined with feedback from insiders, who are not tolerating their misguided and increasingly abusive management



  16. It Certainly Looks Like Microsoft is Already Siccing Its Patent Trolls, Including Intellectual Ventures, on Companies That Use Linux (Until They Pay 'Protection' Money)

    News about Intellectual Ventures and Finjan Holdings (Microsoft-funded patent trolls) reinforces our allegations -- not mere suspicions anymore -- that Microsoft would 'punish' companies that are not paying subscription fees (hosting) or royalties (patent tax) to Microsoft and are thus in some sense 'indebted' to Microsoft



  17. Links 24/3/2017: Microsoft Aggression, Eudyptula Challenge Status Report

    Links for the day



  18. Bernhard Rapkay, Former MEP and Rapporteur on Unitary Patent, Shoots Down UPC Hopes While UPC Hopefuls Recognise That Spain Isn't Interested Either

    Germany, the UK and Spain remain massive barriers to the UPC -- all this in spite of misleading reports and fake news which attempted to make politicians believe otherwise (for political leverage, by means of dirty lobbying contingent upon misinformation)



  19. Links 23/3/2017: Qt 5.9 Beta, Gluster Storage 3.2

    Links for the day



  20. The Administrative Council of the European Patent Organisation Has Just Buried an Innocent Judge That Battistelli Does Not Like

    An innocent judge (never proven guilty of anything, only publicly defamed with help from Team Battistelli and dubious 'intelligence' gathering) is one of the forgotten casualties of the latest meeting of the Administrative Council (AC), which has become growingly complicit rather than a mere bystander at a 'crime' scene



  21. Nepotism at the European Patent Office and Suspicious Absence of Tenders for Big Projects

    Carte blanche is a French term which now perfectly describes the symptoms encountered in the European Patent Office, more so once led by a lot of French people (Battistelli and his friends)



  22. “Terror” Patent Office Bemoans Terror, Spreads Lies

    Response to some of the latest utterances from the European Patent Office, where patently untruthful claims have rapidly become the norm



  23. China Seems to be Using Patents to Push Foreign Companies Out of China, in the Same Way It Infamously Uses Censorship

    Chinese patent policies are harming competition from abroad, e.g. Japan and the US, and US patent policy is being shaped by its higher courts, albeit not yet effectively combating the element that's destroying productive companies (besieged by patent trolls)



  24. 22,000 Blog Posts

    A special number is reached again, marking another milestone for the site



  25. The EPO is Lying to Its Own Staff About ILO and Endless (Over 2 Years) EPO Mistrials

    The creative writing skills of some spinners who work for Battistelli would have staff believe that all is fine and dandy at the EPO and ILO is dealing effectively with staff complaints about the EPO (even if several years too late)



  26. EPO’s Georg Weber Continues Horrifying Trend of EPO Promoting Software Patents in Defiance of Directive, EPC, and Common Sense

    The EPO's promotion of software patents, even out in the open, is an insult to the notion that the EPO is adhering to or is bound by the rules upon which it maintains its conditional monopoly



  27. Protectionism v Sharing: How the US Supreme Court Decides Patent Cases

    As the US Supreme Court (SCOTUS) starts delivering some decisions we take stock of what's to come regarding patents



  28. Links 22/3/2017: GNOME 3.24, Wine-Staging 2.4 Released

    Links for the day



  29. The Battistelli Regime, With Its Endless Scandals, Threatens to Crash the Unitary Patent (UPC), Stakeholders Concerned

    The disdain and the growing impatience have become a huge liability not just to Battistelli but to the European Patent Office (EPO) as a whole



  30. The Photos the EPO Absolutely Doesn't Want the Public to See: Battistelli is Building a Palace Using Stakeholders' Money

    The Office is scrambling to hide evidence of its out-of-control spendings, which will leave the EPO out of money when the backlog is eliminated by many erroneous grants (or rejections)


CoPilotCo

RSS 64x64RSS Feed: subscribe to the RSS feed for regular updates

Home iconSite Wiki: You can improve this site by helping the extension of the site's content

Home iconSite Home: Background about the site and some key features in the front page

Chat iconIRC Channel: Come and chat with us in real time

CoPilotCo

Recent Posts