Bonum Certa Men Certa

With Obedient Dolls Like Gartner and the BSA, Who Needs Enemies?

"Analysts sell out - that’s their business model... But they are very concerned that they never look like they are selling out, so that makes them very prickly to work with."

--Microsoft, internal document



This is certainly not a rant, but merely a comical reminder of who the BSA and Gartner Group really are, as well as whom they serve. To be truthful, it's just business as usual for them. And nevertheless, it's good to find some timely validation from other sources. It lends to credibility.



Those who follow the link digests closely enough probably will have noticed the new article from India about so-called 'piracy' (a propaganda term), whose decline is partly caused by quiet and gradual migrations to Free software.

“It's a pay-for-praise pool of people in suits.”With the exception of the brainwash-loaded headline it's quite a good article because, unlike many others of its kind, it does bother to show that the BSA and its affiliates are not the only game in town. The BSA ambitiously escapes its worst nightmare (and the nightmare of its funding corporations of course). It's free software. It makes them all obsolete. We summarised the escapades of the BSA and Microsoft in the following long post, which serves as decent background (or so we hope). The artificial inflation of figures by criminologists at the BSA gives Microsoft ammunition that changes laws and earns the company sympathy it does not deserve -- always neglecting the ingredient that is alternative products and the effect on copyrights infringement on adoption and widespread vendor lock-in.

Another good exposition comes from Cringely, who speaks about the Gartner Group and the likes of it. We last addressed this serious issue about a month ago. Nothing has changed. It was a couple of months ago that Matt Asay sarcastically said that if you want something good to be said about your company, all you need to do is hire an analyst. That's just how these businesses operate. It's a pay-for-praise pool of people in suits. Information Week too has published an article that questions the integrity of analyst and it put special focus on Gartner, which is fairly large.

Anyone who takes these analysts seriously ought to just take a look at the track record of their predictions. Further, here is Cringely's new take.

I have this notion to write a series of columns from time to time under the title "Reality Check" -- columns intended to explain how the world of Information Technology actually functions. Because like any other entrenched, complex, and often closeted industry, things in IT don't really work the way many people think they do. I'm guessing the Vatican is a bit like that, too. So I'll be looking at various IT players and their roles and trying to put them into perspective, much as I did recently with a column or two about the role of computer consultants. This week the topic is Gartner Inc., or rather all the Gartner-like operations that give advice about technology to America's largest businesses: what do these guys actually DO?

Not much of real value I'm afraid -- at least of value in my view.

[...]

Into this knowledge vacuum come the vendors, who want to sell stuff, and the consultants like Gartner, Forrester, IDC, and the Yankee Group, who need IT managers to feel uncertain about every decision except the decision to buy something, anything. Then look at the number of "research reports" that are commissioned by vendors. Uh-oh.

The five P's of IT are Pride, Prejudice, Politics, Price, and Performance, with the last two being by far the least important. Consultants like Gartner are very useful for minding the pride and politics, their real function being to provide $2 billion worth of IT management CYA per year.


We will surely return to discussing analysts and consultants in the future. Many of them just happen to be some of the world's most respected shills. Alas, we are supposed to look at them with awe and reverence. Corporations teach us to listen to them. Well, wouldn't that be expected from those whom they serve? Self-serving impositions and all?

Recent Techrights' Posts

Father of GNU Giving Keynote Talk Today, Father of Linux Collaborating With Linus Tech Tips (LTT)
Some time soon we can expect Linus Tech Tips (LTT) / Linus Media Group / Linus Gabriel Sebastian to produce something with Torvalds
LLM Slop is an Addiction One Can Quit
Sites that crossed over to "the dark side" (slop) can still return, and even fully regain the trust lost by betraying people with 'botspew'.
BILD is Apparently Covering Up Cocaine Use at Europe's Second-Largest Institution, the European Patent Office, as It's Based on Germany
Journalist contact details
 
German Media and German Politicians: Working for the Public or Manipulating the Public?
The "common person" does not have printing presses
Informing the Public of Suppressed Facts
We are all in this together
Canadian Linus Meets Finnish-American Linus
LTT does have a very large audience, which it can steer away from Microsoft and Windows
The UK's Online Safety Act (OSA) Discourages Technological Entities, Including Free Software Projects, Being Based in or Near the UK
When it comes to IRC hosting, we never had any serious speech restrictions imposed upon us by the UK
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Saturday, November 15, 2025
IRC logs for Saturday, November 15, 2025
Gemini Links 16/11/2025: Emacs Font Fun and UI x TUI x CLI
Links for the day
Flagging or Labelling LLM Slop Meaningfully to Discourage the Practice
We're still refining the annotation for better contrast
Techrights Site Search Pushed to 'Stable'
we've just added it to the navigation menu and footer
Situation Publishing's DevClass (Sister Site of The Register MS, Run by MS Tim) Has Been Abandoned, Microsoft's MS Tim Now Interjects Anti-Linux Directly Into The Register MS
Not only does this sell Microsoft; it's also googlebombing - as before - the real "maui" (or "MauiKit" in Linux).
Many IBM Workers to Become Unemployed a Few Weeks - Maybe Just Days - Before Christmas
as one last humiliating exercise IBM pimps/trots them out in social control media, telling "happy" stories
Slopwatch: LinuxSecurity, WebProNews, and Linux Journal (Slopfarms)
More fake articles about "Linux"
Links 15/11/2025: Openwashing of Kubernetes and Austerity Planned for Canada
Links for the day
Links 15/11/2025: "Small Web, Big Voice" and China Cracking Down on Slop
Links for the day
Links 15/11/2025: Science, Conflicts, and International Politics
Links for the day
Annus Horribilis at the European Patent Office (EPO)
The article explains how the EPO "Cocainegate" scandal is turning 2025 into an Annus Horribilis for Campinos
Links 15/11/2025: Latest in "Component Abuse Challenge" and Qt Keeps Promoting LLM Slop
Links for the day
Gemini Links 15/11/2025: Egoism, Misunderstood Universe, DeX, and "Why desktop Linux is growing"
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Friday, November 14, 2025
IRC logs for Friday, November 14, 2025
Richard Stallman Talk Tomorrow in Ethereum Cypherpunk Congress 2
It's not clear if a livestream of some kind will exist
Many "Last Days" at IBM on Allegedly the "Last Day" for IBM to RA People This Quarter
"Last day" is "social media code" for "got laid off", more so at IBM because they compel people to act like it's a happy departure with gratitude, photos and so on
Slopwatch: Almost a Majority of Google News is Now Slopfarms (Fake Sites, Fake Articles)
Google News is noise
Gemini Links 14/11/2025: Boredom, "Twenty Percent Cooler", and Moving From Windows to Artix
Links for the day
Links 14/11/2025: YouTube's Trap for Publishers, Lack of Accountability a Growing Legal Matter/Concern
Links for the day
Many Times in the Past We Said That Microsoft Lunduke Was Becoming a Spokesperson/Voice for - and Occasionally Weaponising - 4Chan. He's Proving Us Right This Week.
Stay away
The Register MS is Profiting From Pyramid Schemes Run by Americans
We cannot help but feel disgusted by what this publisher became
IBM: Hiring, Then Disposing of, Unpaid or Low-Paid European Staff to Spread or Play Up Buzzwords and Hype
Like Google With "Summer of Code", this seems like a low-cost marketing stunt more than anything substantial
Casual Reminder That We Also Publish GNU/Linux Stories and News Coverage in Tux Machines
Without trust in our robustness (including fearlessness, not just success in protecting stories and sources) we'd not have come this far, nor would I devote my life to it
The Europe Conversation: The EPO Has Cocaine at the High-Level Management and Isn't Denying It
Now we plan to ensure the matter is properly documented in European press
Links 14/11/2025: Goddard Space Center Abused by the White House, Jeffrey Epstein Scandal Expands (Cheetos Need Distraction)
Links for the day
Corporate Media Helps IBM Relay Vapourware (Misinformation/Fake News)
They compensate with words for a lack of compelling products
Hacking on Recipes
Maybe, in due course perhaps, we can also release some of our own cooking recipes or "forks"
Web Searches Far Too Polluted, Gamed by LLM Slop and "Plagiarised Information Synthesis Systems" (PISS)
old articles are already getting difficult to find in mainstream search engines, even if they are still online
Privacy-respecting Metasearch Engine SearX/SearXNG Still Jailed by Microsoft
The official site and code still sadly controlled by Microsoft
"AI" is a Lie. It Always Was. What They Call "AI" Is Not.
This MSM does no favours to the economy
Our First Week of Our Twentieth Year
My wife and I have had a very productive week here and in Tux Machines
Links 14/11/2025: Sleep Research, France to Suspend Pension 'Reform' Law, and Linux Foundation's Latest Openwashing
Links for the day
Gemini Links 14/11/2025: KDE vs XFCE and Leaving the Web
Links for the day
Google Admits It Lost Control of Slop (While Google Itself is Selling Slop, Currently Under the Name "Gemini" Instead of "Bard")
Slop is nothing to be celebrated
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Thursday, November 13, 2025
IRC logs for Thursday, November 13, 2025
Mozilla Handed Over Control Over Firefox to Microsoft, Now Firefox is Preloaded With Microsoft Spyware and It's Proprietary
Who would still want to download Firefox?
Slopwatch: LinuxSecurity, Brian Fagioli, and WebProNews
becoming a slopfarm is a site's suicide
"Sponsored Posts" in The Register MS
That's The Register MS in 2025
IBM RAs in India (Apparently)
IBM is a bad place to work
Another Richard Stallman Talk in Two Days
His talk will be a remote talk, as he won't be travelling to Argentina