Bonum Certa Men Certa

IBM HR "Process is Similar to Raising Farm Animals"

posted by Roy Schestowitz on Jul 02, 2026,
updated Jul 02, 2026

Little Chicken and The Bunnies Artist B. Cobbs Year ca 1908 Public Domain

Hours ago:

24 years at IBM. Last day was Monday.

IBM "silent layoffs" won't stop. The company has nothing to offer, but it pretends otherwise. It masters nothing except cooking the books and borrowing more money to buy more companies (for their revenue, to fake "growth"). A lot of the promised products are purely vapourware, i.e. nothing that will never deliver what's promise or IBM will never actually deliver.

The people who get involved in IBM are being used, then discarded. That's why a common tip at IBM is (given to young graduates who crave any job), get some experience and get out as soon as possible, before the ship sinks.

Some hours ago the thread above (about "farming" talented people, then spitting them out) had this comment: "This process is similar to raising farm animals (chickens, cows, pigs) in small battery cages, stables or pens for sla-ghter. They are fed the best food after being born in the pens, stables and cages and live out their lives in confinement until the day they go to the butcher, abbatoir or sla-ghterhouse. The only difference with the IBM process - this time you're doing it to young humans who you keep for 3 to 5 years in a great environment and then chuck them out without warning into the world for no reason other than they became a trifle expensive for the IBM company to keep on the payroll. Use Layoffs or PIPS to get rid of them. Then the company will look for the next batch of humans to recruit until it's their (the young human's) time to move on. It's extreme Capitalism at it's worst but that is what Ms. Nickel and Dime and her HR department are doing as their strategy for IBM growth. Maybe the same needs to be done to these IBM executive people too."

Hours earlier something posted a short little poem about the ludicrous puff piece in question. Nickel thinks she can replace workers with chatbots and clients won't notice (even IBM insiders are irritated when they get useless chatbots instead of human colleagues).

The poem is lovely:

Nickel, the Laughingstock of IBM HR

There once was a woman named Nickel,

From IBM HR, odd and fickle.

She hired a hat,

Shook hands with a cat,

And paid the whole payroll in pickle.

She once sent a memo to toast,

Then praised it for “leading the most.”

She gave pens a raise,

Sang staplers her praise,

And threw a parade for a post.

Many times in the past we saw criticisms of Nickel censored in bulk, maybe based on legal threats or because it's all presumed sexist. IBM seems to be misusing class, race, and gender politics to frame any sort of criticism as "personal abuse" or "intolerance".


Image source: Little Chicken and The Bunnies Artist B. Cobbs Year ca 1908 Public Domain


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