Bonum Certa Men Certa

With Obedient Dolls Like Gartner and the BSA, Who Needs Enemies?

"Analysts sell out - that’s their business model... But they are very concerned that they never look like they are selling out, so that makes them very prickly to work with."

--Microsoft, internal document



This is certainly not a rant, but merely a comical reminder of who the BSA and Gartner Group really are, as well as whom they serve. To be truthful, it's just business as usual for them. And nevertheless, it's good to find some timely validation from other sources. It lends to credibility.



Those who follow the link digests closely enough probably will have noticed the new article from India about so-called 'piracy' (a propaganda term), whose decline is partly caused by quiet and gradual migrations to Free software.

“It's a pay-for-praise pool of people in suits.”With the exception of the brainwash-loaded headline it's quite a good article because, unlike many others of its kind, it does bother to show that the BSA and its affiliates are not the only game in town. The BSA ambitiously escapes its worst nightmare (and the nightmare of its funding corporations of course). It's free software. It makes them all obsolete. We summarised the escapades of the BSA and Microsoft in the following long post, which serves as decent background (or so we hope). The artificial inflation of figures by criminologists at the BSA gives Microsoft ammunition that changes laws and earns the company sympathy it does not deserve -- always neglecting the ingredient that is alternative products and the effect on copyrights infringement on adoption and widespread vendor lock-in.

Another good exposition comes from Cringely, who speaks about the Gartner Group and the likes of it. We last addressed this serious issue about a month ago. Nothing has changed. It was a couple of months ago that Matt Asay sarcastically said that if you want something good to be said about your company, all you need to do is hire an analyst. That's just how these businesses operate. It's a pay-for-praise pool of people in suits. Information Week too has published an article that questions the integrity of analyst and it put special focus on Gartner, which is fairly large.

Anyone who takes these analysts seriously ought to just take a look at the track record of their predictions. Further, here is Cringely's new take.

I have this notion to write a series of columns from time to time under the title "Reality Check" -- columns intended to explain how the world of Information Technology actually functions. Because like any other entrenched, complex, and often closeted industry, things in IT don't really work the way many people think they do. I'm guessing the Vatican is a bit like that, too. So I'll be looking at various IT players and their roles and trying to put them into perspective, much as I did recently with a column or two about the role of computer consultants. This week the topic is Gartner Inc., or rather all the Gartner-like operations that give advice about technology to America's largest businesses: what do these guys actually DO?

Not much of real value I'm afraid -- at least of value in my view.

[...]

Into this knowledge vacuum come the vendors, who want to sell stuff, and the consultants like Gartner, Forrester, IDC, and the Yankee Group, who need IT managers to feel uncertain about every decision except the decision to buy something, anything. Then look at the number of "research reports" that are commissioned by vendors. Uh-oh.

The five P's of IT are Pride, Prejudice, Politics, Price, and Performance, with the last two being by far the least important. Consultants like Gartner are very useful for minding the pride and politics, their real function being to provide $2 billion worth of IT management CYA per year.


We will surely return to discussing analysts and consultants in the future. Many of them just happen to be some of the world's most respected shills. Alas, we are supposed to look at them with awe and reverence. Corporations teach us to listen to them. Well, wouldn't that be expected from those whom they serve? Self-serving impositions and all?

Recent Techrights' Posts

If Your Company Lost About 30% of Its 'Value' in 3 Months, Then Maybe It Was Never Worth What You Claimed
Does that make sense?
Pleroma is Dying
The last social control media that I joined was Pleroma
Asia and Social Control Media
statCounter reckons it's down from over 10% to just 3% since it began tracking those things
Anonymous Threats Against My Wife and Against Yours Truly
Promoting GNU/Linux and condemning people who attack GNU/Linux is not a crime
Decades-Long Microsofter (Darryl K. Taft) and TIOBE Conflate Microsoft GitHub (Proprietary) With FOSS in Microsoft-Sponsored 'News' Site
We do not intend to do a lengthy debunking because we covered this subject several times in the past
Microsoft Cuts Continue, Visitor Center in Redmond Shut Down
This goes on and on, leading up to the next giant wave of mass layoffs
IBM Bubble Deflating After James Kavanaugh's Accounting Trick With 'Toxic Assets' Comes Under SEC Scrutiny
If something goes up based on false speculations, bonus numbers and self-serving lies, then it'll come back down, eventually...
The EPO's Corruption and Violation of Rules is Spreading to the United Kingdom (Software Patents)
Yesterday a letter was sent to the chief regarding salaries while reminding him of the next strike, which is only 11 days away
IBM Continues Tanking Today, Already $58+ Lower Than Recent High, Insiders Explain Why
The same CFO from the inception of Kyndryl is still the CFO at IBM
 
Gemini Links 13/02/2026: Square Function with Diode Network and Calls Against Discord
Links for the day
Links 13/02/2026: SUSE Uses Microsoft Internally, MElon's Company Helps Turn Epstein Files Into Child Abuse (After the Pornography Scandals)
Links for the day
African Browser Choices Show a Growing Problem in the World Wide Web
World Wide Web (WWW) becoming little but a transport layer for a particular proprietary application (Google Chrome) [...] we're back to the late 1990s
If You Want Digital Freedom, Then Follow Richard Stallman, the "Linux" Brand Has Changed and OSI is Microsoft (GitHub)
If you want something stable and predictable, then stick with GNU, the GPL, and GCC
Solicitors Disciplinary Tribunal and SRA Failing to Curb SLAPPs Against People Who Expose Wrongdoing
We'll soon show messages that we transmitted to politicians
Beware the Latest IBM SPAM, IBM is Already Down "After Hours"
After a harsh day in Wall Street IBM's shares area already down again (after trading hours)
Radicalism in Our Communities is Mostly Corporate, Not Grassroots
Infiltration and systematic destruction can be shallowly painted as "inducing manners"
Life Gets Better After Social Control Media
Don't become part of these experiments
statCounter Suggests Americans Are Dumping Social Control Media
Are Americans getting fed up with social control media and quitting in droves?
Back Doors and Fake Security
They've militarised everything, even people's home computers
Cost-Cutting and Book-Cooking at IBM
It's like cutting salaries by more than 50%
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Thursday, February 12, 2026
IRC logs for Thursday, February 12, 2026
Mainstream Media Intentionally Ignoring EPO Strikes
“EPO on Strike!”
Jeffrey Epstein crypto disclosure: uncanny timing, Bitcoin demise, pump-and-dump, ponzi schemes
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
Gemini Links 12/02/2026: Avoiding Coffee, Trying Ubuntu, and "Open Source Robot"
Links for the day
Microsoft Slop CEO Speaks of Layoffs
They will go along with the "replaced by AI" baloney
In Systematic Contempt of the British High Court, Brett Wilson LLP Spent Two Years Lying to Courts and Breaking Rules Against Us
We criticise Brett Wilson LLP quite lot because of its conduct
IBM Kyndryl as "Aggressive “Enron” Accounting"
IBM Kyndryl continues to nosedive today
Relationships evidence: Tiago, Tassia, Thais, Antonio & Debian favoritism, nepotism
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
Debian pregnancy cluster: why it is public interest
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
State of the Slop, Slopfarms Containment
Slopfarms still exist this year, but their visibility is limited
Links 12/02/2026: Pushback Against, "NATO Is Expected to Step Up Arctic Security"
Links for the day
Links 12/02/2026: "Microsoft Just Forked Windows" and Windows Notepad is a Giant Security Hole
Links for the day
Put Criminals in Prison, Not People Who Report the Crimes
Can people be sent to prison for opposing crime?
Windows Has Become Increasingly Irrelevant
There's a very massive wave of layoffs coming Microsoft's way
Our Most Successful Year Ever
The hired guns in London are eager to turn the UK into another China
Slopfarms Waning, But Not Extinct Yet
Metrics show that usage of LLMs is declining
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Wednesday, February 11, 2026
IRC logs for Wednesday, February 11, 2026
IBM's Stock is Crashing
If it follows the trajectory of its satellite Kyndryl, it can fall and reach as low as $75
Gemini Links 11/02/2026: Sunny Morning and "KiCad Aims to Ease Linux Installation"
Links for the day
Microsoft Loses Ground in Switzerland
One issue is, Google and Apple seem to gain at Microsoft's expense
Microsoft Layoffs Must be Very Near (and Very Large)
just like IBM
Bringing Attention/Awareness of EPO Corruption and Cocaine Use to the Mainstream Media
What has Europe become? Prey to vultures?
The Solicitors Regulation Authority (SRA) Delusion - Part V - Everyone Seems to Agree That SRA is a Sham
We're going to start a new series soon
A Can of WORMS - Part V - Up Next: The Comeback of RMS in the United States
Guess who funds the cancellers
Threats From 'Former' Red Hat (Now IBM) Staff While IBM's Likely Accounting Fraud Attracts Public Scrutiny
We must be getting "warm"
Matthew J. Garrett Has Just Sent a Threat to Put My Wife and I in Prison Because His Own Spouse Says He's a Rapist
What really intimidates him is his own spouse
Gemini Links 11/02/2026: Terminator Trilogy and Lagrange in the Apple App Store
Links for the day
Links 11/02/2026: Fentanylware (CheeTok) for ICE, Jimmy Lai Shows Journalism Became 'Crime' in Hong Kong
Links for the day
With Firefox Measured at 2% in the United Kingdom Time is Running Out for Web Site Support for Gecko/Servo Users
The open Web is rapidly dying while Mozilla celebrates and champions slop
Lawsuit reactions: EFF behaviour reveals zombification, censorship
Reprinted with permission from Daniel Pocock
Links 11/02/2026: $700 Billion Slop Bill, Social Control Media Under Political Fire for Deliberate Health Harms
Links for the day
Amended Input From Software Freedom Institute for EU Consultation on Free Software
"On 3 February 2026 Software Freedom Institute lodged a submission with the European Commission's inquiry into Open Digital Ecosystems"
Mobbing at the European Patent Office (EPO) - Part VI - Attacks on Staff and Attacks on the Law Merit Another New Series
new series coming shortly
Nadella's Mindless PR Spam Ahead of the Layoffs 'Snowball' (Adding Up Batches) Turning Into an Avalanche
Based on recent observations, the more puff pieces we see about Nadella, the closer we get to Microsoft "pulling the trigger" on mass layoffs
When Happens to Red Hat If (or When) IBM Collapses
IBM is in flux because its CFO is now implicated in what seems like accounting fraud
IBM's Financial Engineering (Accounting Fraud) Shell, Kyndryl Holdings Inc, is Insolvent
If this was done by the very same people who still run IBM, can we expect any better from "Sugar Daddy" IBM?
2026 a Very Productive Year and We Have Many Big Stories to Tell
maybe we'll produce 8,000 new articles/pages by year's end
Clownflare is in Trouble as Its Debt More Than Doubled in Less Than a Year, Expect Further Enshittification
Clownflare isn't free
After the Next Wave of Microsoft Layoffs Washington State Could be #1 for US Layoffs
Microsoft Corp shares were down yesterday
EPO's Local Staff Committee The Hague (LSCTH): The EPO is Generally “Managed by Excel” (Microsoft)
The current management has basically defined corruption to be "success"
With an IBM Company Down Over 75% After Apparent Accounting Fraud the IBM Insiders Want Answers From James Krabanaugh
He has no technical qualifications
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Tuesday, February 10, 2026
IRC logs for Tuesday, February 10, 2026