Bonum Certa Men Certa

Matthew Garrett’s Twitter Log Shows Exactly Why We Need to Give Security Theater the Boot

Guest post by Ryan, reprinted with permission from the original

Matthew Garrett put Security Theater Boot support into the Linux kernel some time ago, and he got a Free Software Treachery Award for it from the joke that the FSF has turned into.



"Bootkits just really aren’t much of a problem on desktop GNU/Linux..."Now on his Twitter log, he shows us some of the mess he has caused.



See, if you have “Secure” Boot turned on, and you shouldn’t, but if you do, you’ll see the Linux kernel complain that it is disabling hibernation support, and while that alone really isn’t a huge problem because as long as you can suspend and resume (which still is far from given these days even though we were lied to and told uEFI would be better, over ten years ago), it really shows where we’re at now.



Bootkits just really aren’t much of a problem on desktop GNU/Linux, and I doubt they were ever a real problem on much of anything involving a competently-administered GNU/Linux systems, except maybe embedded hardware, where they can lock it down all they want, but those people don’t care about security. If some asshole at Netgear can make a cable modem based on a Linux 2.6 kernel, you’d better believe they’ll do it. After all, you probably won’t know if your modem is compromised.



In reality, I strongly suspect that even on the Windows side, Security Theater Boot was implemented to make it harder to crack Windows using a boot activation exploit. While it’s true that Microsoft laid off the locking people out of their computer over activation failures, for now, the truth is that after Windows 11 requires Security Theater Boot, OEMs may just make it mandatory and stick you with it, and then Microsoft could decide at any time to stop signing shim, and there’s no way to boot GNU/Linux on a PC anymore. The minute they think they can, they will. The only reason you could turn it off up until now was that they had legacy software and hardware in support, but that’s going away.



"But in exchange for false security which doesn’t gain us anything, we’re forced to deal with no hibernation..."It’s part of the “Up yours, buy new stuff!” theme of Windows 11 where lots of expensive computers won’t run it because they’re 36 months old. (But switching to GNU/Linux on these is probably an option for you.).



But in exchange for false security which doesn’t gain us anything, we’re forced to deal with no hibernation, an entire “kernel lockdown” (unauthorized access… by you, the owner of the machine) patch set whose entire goal was to remove the user’s control over kernel settings from userspace (which Microsoft didn’t even publicly demand in exchange for signing the shim bootloader after Red Hat and Canonical bent the knee instead of filing lawsuits), and has left us unable to extend the kernel that runs our own machines with out-of-tree drivers that we feel like running.



Since people can delete tweets and make them unavailable for critical comment, here’s what this sanctimonious asshole has been up to lately.



UEFI troll tweet



UEFI troll tweet

UEFI broken
Yes, that FAMOUS GNU/Linux bootloader, “Windows Bootloader”. There it is, under P:\EFI\Microsoft\Boot\en-us. I’d recognize it anywhere!



He guesses and gets it into the kernel, and you get to wonder if your OS will work later. He also exaggerates, misdirects, and misleads. (see above) But that’s what carnival barkers do.



That is sort of what happens when you have a failed biologist implementing Security Theater from Microsoft. Getting money from them by proxy to do it with.



The company that brought you Windows.



The operating system that goes “Herr! Derr! Here you go, have some files dumped on this here flash drive because the letter belonged to your portable hard disk earlier! Here’s some Microsoft Defender, don’tcha know!?”.



Anyway, I really do wish I had all day to read his Twitter blogs where he pontificates about how the police who protect him from the rioters are evil murderers. But I’ve thought about him too much for one day just for this post.



Anyway, enjoy Windows 11. I’m sure it’ll be great.

Recent Techrights' Posts

"EU's reform agenda threatens to erase a decade of digital rights"
This is really sad for those of us who spent decades promoting and boosting/advocating the EU
IBM Layoffs in India, More Coming Soon, Say Apparent Insiders
Threads regarding IBM layoffs
Gemini Links 29/12/2025: Earlier "Happy New Year 2026" and "Dead Archivist Society"
Links for the day
Links 29/12/2025: Putin Critic Sergei Udaltsov Imprisoned, Cloudflare’s Outages Discussed
Links for the day
LLMs Are Inherently Parasitic, We Need to Treat Them Accordingly
a maintenance burden for those who possess actual intelligence
Links 29/12/2025: Bottled Water Considered Harmful, Cheetos Promoting Nazis in Europe
Links for the day
EPO People Power - Part XVIII - European Patent Office "Paints Itself as Progressive While Literally Being Represented by Cokeheads"
To what length/s will German authorities and media (not just in Germany) go to protect the EPO's "precious image"?
What IBM Will Do to Red Hat in the Coming Year or Years
This won't end up well for GNU/Linux as a whole
Not Turning in His Grave: When People Die, Their Corporate Destruction Becomes a "Turnaround"
All he did was mass layoffs - a tradition that has not ended since then
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Sunday, December 28, 2025
IRC logs for Sunday, December 28, 2025
Louis Gerstner Has Died, His Legacy of Mass Layoffs at IBM Hasn't
Hagiographies will follow. They will say he "saved" IBM.
Links 29/12/2025: The Sunday Routine, Limits of Memory, and Gemini Vocabulary
Links for the day
Doxing is Illegal in the UK (Even If You're Based in the US)
Somebody has just added my identity (name, mugshot etc.) to a "hitlist" site of a political nature, pandering to violent people
Misunderstood Weapons of Censorship
It's cruel world out there. One needs to be aware of these shady activities, including "censorship-as-a-service".
Google Confidently Wrong, Nowadays Defaming People Too
I can relate as people did this to me and to my wife
What Happens When Americans Are Out of Office (Away From Work) for a Week? Vista 11 "Share" Falls to Just 10%.
How's that for slow adoption?
2026 Will Have EPO Focus, People Will See What the EPO is Trying to Hide
We certainly hope people will be held accountable
EPO People Power - Part XVII - Drugged, Stoned, and Drunk at the Office During Working Hours (Campinos Friend and Propaganda Chief Has Long Done This)
It's a total disgrace that press all over Europe is still trying to cover this up!
Gemini Links 28/12/2025: Health Ordeals and Discontinued Pedals
Links for the day
Slop About "Linux" Came Only From One Slopfarm This Weekend
Another day has passed with no LLM slop found in our RSS feeds
Links 28/12/2025: 'Digital Detox' and Slop "Backlash Grew Massively in 2025"
Links for the day
Links 28/12/2025: "Mass Quitting Apple" and "Generative AI Industry is Fraudulent, Immoral and Dangerous"
Links for the day
Links 28/12/2025: Fascination, Holidays, and Mormonism
Links for the day
Microsoft's Weapon Against the Reality of XBox (the Console) Dying Seems to be LLM Slop
XBox is dead/dying
Raffles for the Immaterial: Unauthorised Bingo for Red Hat "Vouchers"
This is IBM and some slop images
Andy Farnell on Standing Up Against Technological Oppression
some portions from it
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Saturday, December 27, 2025
IRC logs for Saturday, December 27, 2025
Once Again, GAFAM Deletes All Your Data, Only Corrects This After Millions of People Lead an Uproar Online ("Richard Stallman Warned Us About This")
No lessons learned, eh?
Linus Torvalds Blasts Software Freedom Conservancy (SFC) for Attempting to 'Protect' Linux
Like it 'protects' women
New Record for GNU/Linux in Australia (at Microsoft's Expense)
Windows is at an all-time low, GNU/Linux... all-time high
Fighting Over Whose Pockets Are Deeper (or Who Borrows More Money)
When processes favour those who are more wealthy (or more willing to go into infinite debt or steal money of other people) those processes match the attributes of lawfare rather than law
You Know Your Critics Are Jealous and Have Inferiority Complex When...
One day we'll write about all this in great depth
Starting a Book With a Flawed Premise or Weak Hypothesis
To me, Schneier is a sort of "RMS of sec"
Microsoft's Mass Layoffs (30,000+ in 2025) Not About "AI", Just Business Failure
"AI" is replacing... the old excuses for mass layoffs
"But Corruption is Everywhere"
"We'll always have Polio..."
EPO People Power - Part XVI - Berenguer Does Not Speak German, So What Did He Tell German Police That Busted Him?
based in Germany and does not speak the language
Challenges for EPO Insiders to Try to Tackle in 2026
Nothing will get solved as long as the circus that runs this show tries to keep the circus going
Days Without Slop About "Linux"
It's time to move on
Links 27/12/2025: Canada Post Strike Called Off, Debate About Europeans "Working Over Christmas"
Links for the day
Gemini Links 27/12/2025: Household Appliances and Flight Fright
Links for the day
Links 27/12/2025: US Cracking Down on Whistleblowers, Expanding Bombardment Campaigns Worldwide
Links for the day
Resuming EPO Coverage Today, Can António Campinos 'Survive' Cocainegate?
We said we'd continue in the weekend
Links 27/12/2025: More Attacks on Media (Meduza Co-founder Sentenced to Prison in Absentia), "What Owning Music Means To Me"
Links for the day
Gemini Links 27/12/2025: geminiprotocol.net Downtime and Capsular Gemlog Manager
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Friday, December 26, 2025
IRC logs for Friday, December 26, 2025