Bonum Certa Men Certa

In Lawyerland, Simulated UPC 'Trials' and More Extraordinary EPO Propaganda for Change That Would Harm Europe to Help Patent Lawyers and Their Big Clients

Like the mock trials recently used against EPO staff representatives?

UPC mock trial
Photo of UPC mock trial by Sofia Willquist (context)



Summary: A look at the latest wave of lobbying for the Unitary Patent Court (UPC), courtesy of patent lawyers who profit from patent disputes, and the utterly shameless marketing from the European Patent Office (EPO)

"UPC mock trial before the Swedish-Baltic court in Stockholm. Historic moment!" That's what Sofia Willquist just wrote. One can imagine -- and be correct about -- what Willquist does for a living.



Benjamin Henrion asked her, "was it in Swedish?"

"The UPC may be exciting to patent lawyers (and their biggest clients), but not to anybody else, definitely not to Spain, which got blackmailed over its stance on the UPC.""Yet another argument for Swedes to challenge this language discrimination at the ECHR in Strasbourg," he added later. "UPC court in Sweden will be in English. Where is the Swedish language? Time for Strasbourg," he wrote, clarifying that: "As far as I know, English is not an official language of any of those states."

Imagine being an Italian or Spanish person such as a small business owner, then suddenly getting sued from abroad (e.g. US) for allegedly infringing on a patent, only to be forced to hire lawyers and interpreters (for defence of one's innocence) because a trial in a foreign language is being imposed without choice, irrespective of the native/local language in the territory of alleged infringement. Oh, wouldn't the trolls just love it! Texans can comprehend British accents.

"Pay close attention to who's promoting the UPC."We wrote about language aspects of the UPC yesterday, in relation to Spanish (by some criteria, the world's most spoken language). See our article "A La Oficina Europea de Patentes (OEP) no le gusta el Español, Así que PorQué los EspaÅ„oles la Toleran?"

The UPC may be exciting to patent lawyers (and their biggest clients), but not to anybody else, definitely not to Spain, which got blackmailed over its stance on the UPC. Spain has had its share of scandals (some involve a Spanish Vice-President at the EPO [1, 2, 3]) and there are some puff pieces about the EPO in Spanish right now, but one cannot lose sight of the fact that the UPC is driven to a large degree by few people's greed, even political abuse. Watch Alexander Esslinger ‏("patently German") marketing the UPC this week with "Kevin Mooney: #UPC opt-out fee would most likely be 0 EUR instead of 80 EUR as originally planned" (the real cost is being passed to the public, not the applicants for example, so this misses the point).

"Watch out as the UPC basically became one of several Trojan horses, alongside TTIP, TTP, and so on."Pay close attention to who's promoting the UPC. See our recent article "UPC: To Understand Who Would Benefit From It Just Look at Who’s Promoting It (Like TPP)". The EPO is funding pro-UPC propaganda events. There are even patent lawyers that rebrand themselves to capitalise on the UPC. Here we have UPC advocacy from "Bristows UPC" (basically Bristows LLP rebranded to reach out to potential clients). They wrote yesterday that: "The UPC Preparatory Committee has published locations so far confirmed for the UPC divisions, including addresses and photos. The information, published on the UPC website here, will be added to as more locations are confirmed, but it currently comprises: the Court of Appeal in Luxembourg; four local divisions in Germany (Düsseldorf, Hamburg, Munich and Mannheim) the Nordic-Baltic regional division based in Stockholm (covering Sweden, Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania), and the German branch of the central division (in Munich but in a different location from the local division). It should be noted, however, that the UK government decided last year that the UK branch of the central division and also the UK’s local division will be in the newly-built Aldgate Tower in London, and therefore it is expected that this information will be shortly be included."

Watch out as the UPC basically became one of several Trojan horses, alongside TTIP, TTP, and so on. It's about benefiting those who already benefited for many years and became very affluent thanks to policies (like tax exemptions and bans/sanctions of competition). Think along the lines of I.S.D.S. It boils down to protectionism.

"The EPO is now trying to paint itself as a proponent of plant varieties; all this while promoting the Monsanto agenda."One can rest assured that the EPO will continue lobbying for the UPC. The managers (essentially top managers) seem to have made it their number one objective and the EPO's PR team works overtime, even on January first. At least three tweets with 404 errors were posted yesterday (on Thursday) by the EPO's Twitter account. Yes, in three different tweets from @EPOorg the links to the EPO's site were broken. The EPO is rotting, but Team Battistelli still tries to maintain a perception of legitimacy. Yesterday there were no less than two 'news' items in the EPO's Web site, one pertaining to patents on plants (looks like a public relations stunt/exercise, where a patent office that notoriously allows patents on plants does some photo-op with "Plant Variety Office"). To quote the EPO's spinners: "The two organisations agreed to further strengthen their relationship through the exchange of information in the area of plant-related patents and plant variety rights. The Arrangement was signed in Munich, where the CPVO delegation, led by President Martin Ekvad, was welcomed by EPO President Benoît Battistelli."

Don't laugh. They actually mean it. The EPO is now trying to paint itself as a proponent of plant varieties; all this while promoting the Monsanto agenda. Incidentally, in yesterday's news in English (Swiss Info) there was this article that said: "The European Patent Office (EPO) has rejected a request by Nespresso to revoke a patent owned by the Ethical Coffee Company (ECC), which is now calling for the halt of sales of infringing Nespresso machines in Germany. [...] For its part, Nespresso expressed its disappointment in a statement, and said it plans to appeal the EPO decision."

"The EPO has become one massive scandal."At the EPO, corporations (not SMEs) are patenting just about anything these days; the EPO allows this in order to drive up the numbers, just like in the US. There are "100 million patent documents" which the EPO now brags giving access to (warning: epo.org link). Imagine having to do 'research' on patents (with this kind of volume) in order to avert wilfull infringement. "You can subscribe to PATSTAT's worldwide bibliographical patent data," the EPO wrote, "covering nearly 100 million patent documents from more than 90 authorities worldwide. Optionally, you can also include worldwide legal status patent data and online access to European Patent Register data will be available soon."

With the UPC, for instance, the archive would be further broadened. How many individual/independent inventors (or SMEs) can afford to deal with this mess? Who profits from EPO's extensive and ever-growing patent archive, not to mention expensive storage/scanning? Who profits from patent searches? Remember what a French Former VP is doing right now [1, 2, 3, 4]. The EPO has become one massive scandal. The UPC would further empower these lunatics.

Recent Techrights' Posts

Links 16/05/2026: Climate Issues, Free Speech, and Monopolies/Monopsonies
Links for the day
 
Links 16/05/2026: Cuba Plunges Into Darkness (Energy Wasted by Nonsense), Googlebooks as Slop Nonsense (Energy Waste and Time Wasted)
Links for the day
Gemini Links 16/05/2026: Retreat and Devuan Manuals
Links for the day
SLAPP Censorship - Part 78 Out of 200: Slandering Me for Saying the Truth About Graveley and Garrett's Abuse of Processes, Stacking Dockets
These are the sorts of things British taxpayers ought to talk about
"AI" Became a New Name or Placeholder for Debt
Because they will only ever lose money for this thing with "tokens" or "potential"
"Microsoft Goodwill and Intangible Assets" Down Two Years in a Row, According to Microsoft
Microsoft cannot sell these, so what is their real relevance?
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Friday, May 15, 2026
IRC logs for Friday, May 15, 2026
IBM: Shares Down 30%, Mass Layoffs, IBM Says "Goodwill" Grew by 10% to Over a Third of the Company's Total "Worth"
According to IBM
Microsoft LinkedIn Layoffs "Very Likely Higher" Than 1,000 People
Microsoft is bleeding
The Corrupt Lecture the Non-Corrupt - Part XXIV - Luis Berenguer Giménez at the EPO (European Patent Office) Became the Punchline of EPO Staff
"the fact that Luis was caught with cocaine causes laughter. The use of cocaine in itself is not the real shocking bit."
IBM Keeps Culling Essential Linux, Fedora, GNOME, and GTK Staff
Over a month ago IBM laid off over 400 Red Hat engineers
Cisco Cuts Nearly 4,000 Jobs Because of Debt, Nothing to Do With Slop
The media keeps talking about revenue, not profits
Gemini Links 15/05/2026: UDP Game Forwarding Over SSH, Avoiding LLMs, and Alhena 5.5.9
Links for the day
Links 15/05/2026: Electric Company Shuns Entire Town to Prioritise Only Data Centres, Saudi Arabia and U.A.E. Carried Out Secret Attacks in Iran
Links for the day
LLM Slop is Not Reliable, Constitutes No Process of 'Thinking'; There's No Thought Process at All, No Grasp or Understanding, Let Alone Context
Lies have become the "business model" [...] More people ought to talk about it and explain to other people what LLMs really are
Not a Security Expert If You Cannot Manage to Keep Online a Simple Two-User Mastodon Instance Somebody Else Built
From uptime of ~99% to maybe 80%
Microsoft Has All the Symptoms of a Dying Company (Mass Layoffs of the People Who Built the Company)
the company's debt is going through the ceiling
Focus is Important, Focus is Everything
We are still running 6 multi-part series in tandem
For Effective 'Finlandisation' (Not Digital Sovereignty) to Be Replaced by Autonomy Finland Needs to Think Like GNU (Software Freedom), Not Linux (Openwashing Source, Plus LLM Slop and Killswitches)
What is 'Finlandisation'?
Guest Post on False Marketing and PR Blitzes by Anthropic
A lot of people my age are just tired of the nonsense
Links 15/05/2026: UK antitrust regulator is officially investigating Microsoft Office, Anthropic’s Fraudulent Lies About Mythoslop Don't Withstand Scrutiny
Links for the day
IBM's Kyndryl in Trouble: Mass Layoffs, Payroll Problems, Buybacks (in Company Whose Debt is Almost Twice Its Total Value), and Soon $9 Per Share (Down Over 80%)
Kyndryl is done. Stick a fork in it.
ICYMI: GNU/Linux Did Not Start in Finland
If we're honest/true to ourselves, we need to recognise history for what it is, not what some corporations (like GAFAM) want it to be
IBM is Googlebombing the Media With Fake Numbers to Promote Fake Technology
a classic example of why much of today's media cannot be trusted (anymore)
Up to 10,000 Microsoft Layoffs in a Couple of Months
Many ways to skin a cat
Truth Hurts. People Hurt by Truth Aren't Entitled to Compensation.
Family members aren't exempt
SLAPP Censorship - Part 77 Out of 200: They Never Knew How to Handle Women (Except to Attack Them)
The case against us was really quite simple
Update on Sirius Open Source in 2026 (When Your Former Employer Commits Crimes and Nobody is Held Accountable)
I did not envision myself spending several years (even 4 years after leaving that company) challenging the system for tolerating and even covering up corruption
Codecs and Software Patents - Part VII - Entering Phase II, the Battle Against Companies That Normalise Taxed (by Patents on Mathematics) Codecs
In the next few part we'll deal with the impact on Free software, including the GNU Project
The Corrupt Lecture the Non-Corrupt - Part XXIII - Cocaine Use at the EPO's Top-Level Management "Adds Up" and Worsens Things "Over Time"
"cocaine use knocks the IQ down permanently a tiny bit with each use. Over time that adds up."
Gemini Links 15/05/2026: Slop Fatigue and Banning LLM Use
Links for the day
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Thursday, May 14, 2026
IRC logs for Thursday, May 14, 2026
Links 14/05/2026: Health Science, Cheeto Meets Pooh, and Facebook Staff Loathing the CEO
Links for the day
Gemini Links 14/05/2026: Early Morning Practice and Number to Roman Numeral Converter
Links for the day
FSF Advertises the Father of Software Freedom Giving a Talk in Germany (a Digital Sovereignty Interest Hub, Sponsor of Free Software)
Free Software vs malware and the need for reverse engineering
Cybershow (UK) Shaping Up to be a Neat and Very Large Gemini Capsule
If only more platforms did the same, plenty of energy would be spared, "old" machines would be totally suitable (even with 20 tabs open), as we'd focus on substance, not bells and whistles
SLAPP Censorship - Part 76 Out of 200: The Problem With the United Kingdom Allowing Americans to File Lawsuits by Proxy (Relayed by "Hired Guns")
Solicitors in UK warned not to act as ‘hired guns’ to silence critics of super-rich
When Microsoft's LinkedIn Goes Offline All Your Fake Friends/Connections and Manufactured 'Status' Will be Gone
Many people quit social control media because they recognise it for what it truly is
Major Setback for IBM in the Courtroom, the Demolition of IBM is Proving Costly
Kyndryl is a sign of how IBM ("mother ship") is run and where IBM is heading
Links 14/05/2026: Willful Ignorance and Mass Layoffs at Microsoft
Links for the day
Gemini Links 14/05/2026: Rewatching V for Vendetta, JPEG XL, and Platform Migrations
Links for the day
The Corrupt Lecture the Non-Corrupt - Part XXII - What the Science Says About Cocaine in the Workplace (EPO President, Mr. Campinos, Please Take Note)
What the science says
European Patent Office (EPO) President, Mr. Campinos, Ignoring Its Staff While Protecting His Friends
the President is covering up cocaine use while ignoring his own workers
Slop Cannot Replace Everybody (the Story of Perl and Universities)
Quantity where abundance exists is without merit; quality is what people opt for as they have limited time and patience
Over at Tux Machines...
GNU/Linux news for the past day
IRC Proceedings: Wednesday, May 13, 2026
IRC logs for Wednesday, May 13, 2026